Business Philosophy Explorer T-Shirts

'You can take over Smelton and Company but you can't take over Smelton.'

"'Quid pro quo' is a no-no, Bradbury. Around here we say 'reciprocal altruism'."

"Don't flutter your little wings on company time."

'I clawed my way to the top and then I clawed my way back to the middle.'

"Actually, the district office is getting better results with a fresh garlic bagel."

'I'm afraid you don't have the leadership qualities we're seeking.'

'I just don't feel I'm getting anywhere.'

I'm not making enough money to like you.

"Look at them smiling. They've reached their comfort zone."

"Work hard, make the sacrifices and in 25 years you could be just like me!"

Motivation to work

"Actually, it's more like a mouse race."

'My pessimism keeps me optimistic.'

"Ahh... don't you just LOVE that new, re-organized-under-bankruptcy-protection smell?"

Man at desk has a desk tray labeled "In one ear,' and another labeled "Out the other."

'Your salary will help you learn the lesson that life is not fair.'

"Maybe we should have another look at the 'business as usual' idea."

"I think we're all agreed that we need to focus 110% on meeting strategic corporate goals."

"Meanwhile, obsessing about productivity is way up."

'I hate his kind. They use their integrity and hard work to advance their careers.'

"I misjudged you Fenton. I thought you were a 'mover and shaker' but all the time you were just bobbing and weaving."

The role of administration.

'Not only does he suffer from anxiety, he makes everyone else suffer from it too.'

"Sir, the staff are all assembled for your pep talk."

'Don't laugh Ms. Newborn, but I want you to proof this for 'accuracy'.'

''A desk job.' That's what they called it at the interview.' 'Same here.' 'SHH!'

'You've become like a son to me, Alvin. But the company has strict rules against nepotism, so I have to let you go.'

'Apparently you can't fire everybody and still maintain productivity.'

'I tried that approach once, but my employees seized the carrots and attacked me with sticks.'

"The boss says he can remember the day I first started...but nothing after that."

"After an extensive analysis of your company's strengths and weaknesses our recommendation is to give us more money."

'Nothing about the evils of corporate downsizing?'

I can outsource your job to someone who'll work longer hours for less money. Less money I can understand...but how do they make the hours longer than 60 minutes?

"Someone, call the office and see if we can get a fresh carrot."

'Thanks, Brian, for your thoughtful and constructive proposal. Without further ado, we'll now dive into malicious, envy-based criticism, character assassination and petty bickering!'