Burger King Fan Gifts

Burger Monarch Needs Help with Taxes

If a bunch of crazy red headed clowns come out that door...Run like you've never ran before!

'Don't order the Super Duper Jumbo Special.'

Burger Queen: The Patriarchy is Dead.

'Be honest. Does this double bacon cheeseburger with large fries and shake make me look fat?'

'Now that's what I call a kebab... a skewer with whole pies!'

"Mommy's going to teach you how to make a hamburger."

"Two burgers, two fries, two martinis—and we'll have those to go."

"Five hamburgers with buns, three hamburgers without buns and two buns, without hamburgers."

A golden Big Boy holding a plate of poop

"Okay - who wants theirs well done?"

Would you be willing to sign something regarding the fat content of your burger? Like what? My colon.

'Yes, I am impressed at how fast you got here, but where's my pizza?'

"He says that when he had a vegetable salad as an appetizer, he can now have burgers, pizza and Coke as a reward."

'I made your favorite for dinner — pterodactyl nuggets!'

Alas poor Daisy, I knew her well!

"The secret of my success is combining eggs, meat and bread in enough ways to make an eight page breakfast menu."

'How can he be depressed when all he eats are Happy Meals?'

"I don't care if it's plant-based, you're creeping everyone out."

Nutrition-Free Diet

Licensed to grill.

'Well, if you're going to order 'left wings' and I'm going to order 'right,' maybe we should just order burgers instead.'

"Look out, Luke Grasswalker! Irascibility leads to the dark side of the force. . . right into a hamburger bun."

A boy who loves cows/burgers

The proper term for our special promotion is Triple Cheeseburger with a Gazillion fries...not the triple bypass special!

'A HAMBURGER?.. really?.. I took you for the WEENIE type!'

"Well, I'm the company sports champion! During the lunch break I ate more hamburgers than any other colleague!"

'A Quarter-Tonner, please.'

The miracle of 2-for-1 pizza.

Sisyphus Sawyer

'The two-pounds-burger menu includes chips, a large drink and an arteriosclerosis treatment.'

"Bob, you're just not selling me on you essential hamburgerness."

'I am the ghost of Christmas future...with fries!'

'You'll love this, it has no nutritional value.'

The mission: Impossible burger.