Bureaucracy Debunker Pillows

Policeman giving paramedics a fine.

'So your Lordship, this burglar you caught - where is he now?'

"The good news is you’re the only one we’re not firing ... the bad news is you’re the only one to run the department."

"You've got to fill in these forms to join the 'How to reduce bureaucracy' seminar."

'It seems every time my business grows so does my paperwork!'

"So we are agreed then, most of the targets we've set staff are completely unreasonable and we should just scrap them."

UK/US Free Trade Deal

"If we can just get beyond this 'I'm the boss' mentality and concentrate on a simple 'What I say goes' outlook, I think this will all work out."

'Hello? Missing Persons?'

"That report on corporate redundancy... I'd like it in triplicate."

Quality Control

Washington D.C., Acronym Capital of the World

Food Chain, Inc: 'UP...DOWN'.

Time for More Paperwork

"It's a new target to target a time to reduce targets so that we'll be less target driven!"

'Yes, sir, what can I do for you?'

Moses holds up new federal regulation guidelines.

Businessman sees door sign 'Department of Mismanagement and Overbudget'.

"Of course it's a stupid sign, but you wouldn't believe how much money it brings in for city hall!"

"How long were you in the waiting room?"

"We should have taken the cubicles."

"They found a use for that old paper shredder."

"‘Click’, you have reached the White House, press 1 for shameless groveling, 2 for presidential pardons, and please have your credit card details ready..."

"I'll be honest... there are books by James Joyce that are easier to follow than these bad boys."

"...our Annual Report has been criticised for lack of clarity - well done!"

'I'm afraid I can't take you to my leader without a prior appointment.'

'Item 56, we need to schedule a series of meetings to discuss whether we should have meeting to look at whether we're having too many meetings.'

"These are just the guidelines, the forms are in the truck outside!"

We're transferring you to company headquarters so you can kiss company hindquarters.

"The admin shouldn’t take more than 30 or 40 hours, then you’ll be free to get on with some work."

"Do you have an appointment?"

'...And they're giving us sixty million years to get in compliance.'

'We decided the current system for reviewing corporation tax was too complex so we'll trial the 'think of a number and then double it' method.'

'This is a job for a consultant.'

'I think I found the bottleneck, Boss.'