Building Site Humorist Pillows

"That's why safety boots are so important. . . you see? Eddie's feet have stayed perfectly dry."

"Haha...check out the typo on this head office memo. They're sending an elven safety officer out to inspect the site."

'No, this metal stress can't be fixed with liberal doses of antidepressants.'

'Masonry robot, what are you doing?'

Lumber Yard. Luxury Homes! Some Assembly Required.

'The hard hats? In case of falling interest rates.'

'My analysis indicates the need for an asbestos-ectomy, electrical-graphs and a plumbing-bypass.'

'Still workin' on the beard, Jerry?'

Building a better America - Financing by The Bank of China.

Dave, determined to go green by using only solar powered tools, will hereafter check weather reports before making bids.

Town Planning Department

Stone henge swing.

'Uh oh, I measured the lumber in feet, but you measured it in metric.'

'If the GPC built office blocks!'

"I think these may be counterfeit bolts."

'Don't worry. The first 30 years of being an inspector are the hardest.'

Cost cutting construction ideas that failed: using rhubarb instead of rebar in concrete.

"No, this metal stress can't be fixed with liberal doses of antidepressants."

Dominoes

"We had to put three screws in his neck and a steel plate in his head."

"I think we can agree that the bridge collapsing is not a good thing."

'If straw and sticks don't appeal, I do have something in brick that might interest you.'

'Useful Drywall Screws' next to a huge box of 'Useless Drywall Screws.'

'That's gonna be a big job, boss.'

Oh, one door closes, another opens -- How have you been?

I like going across the frame of this solar energy facility we're building. I'm waling on a sunbeam!

It looks like wood, but it's actually vinyl siding.

Private work adjustments

Is the heating contractor mad about something? He just needs space to vent?

"Is this your first bricklaying job, Kevin...?"

Super Homeworld

Model Village/Realistic Model Village.

'Remind me to tell the crane driver to bring a flask tomorrow.'

'He thinks we're watering down the cement.'

'Design brief.'