Budgeting Hobbyists T-Shirts

"Nothing up my sleeve, nothing in my hat—what do you expect in this economy?"

"We only got six days of funding."

'You have to reconcile your gross habits with your net income.'

'What's the smallest budget you can manage on?' 'The most you can give me!'

'Well, I got a hunting license and a fishing license and by golly I'm going to use them.'

'And this is my strategic money reserve.'

'I used to work for the Treasury Department, but there's no future in economic forecasts.'

"Seriously, you can't balance the budget with cushion change."

"What comes after zillion?"

'And finally, a steady decline in earnings has forced us to trim the presentations budget.'

'With 5% spent on talent, 5% on production, and 90% on marketing...I smell WINNER!'

"I hate check writing, but, hey, it pays the bills."

'My husband thought he could save money by repairing it himself.'

'Carry on sailor, just keep swimming around the coast and stick your head up now and again.'

"The Treasury is fairly sure that the figures in the budget are correct, they might just not be in the right order!"

"So, the bills still aren't paid? You've never been good at money management."

Rare Medical Conditions - The compulsive desire to work out restaurant bills correctly

'We've gone over your budget very carefully, Mr Thorne. Unfortunately the network does not sell 7-second spots.'

'So the prince and princess lowered their expectations became savvy consumers, then they lived reasonably contented forever after.'

The ways and means committee reaches the tipping point.

'In a cost-saving move, I've replaced your cubicle with a back pack.'

'As a kid I was always taking things apart...so, anyway, that's when my parents stopped getting me pets.'

Financial Execution

"With the rises in fuel, food and mortgage I'm going to have to put in some overtime."

'My pay envelope is empty.' - 'Your deductions equal your salary'

'The attack will have to wait until tomorrow Congressman. Today is furlough day. . .'

"He can afford a bigger cage. His old tax forms line the bottom."

"Post-holiday dieting will be much easier this year. Our disposable cash flow will be diverted."

Squeezing a tight budget...

US Deficit

'I want to return this wallet. I can't seem to keep any money in it.'

Gentleman, things are worse than we thought.

The Department Chairs react to the budget cuts.

"The school construction budget is so small we can't even afford to build a snowman."

'I grow all our tomatoes. I grow all our spinach. All you do is complain about the cost of my twice weekly manicures.'