Budgeting Champion Pillows

'You know I'd love to take you for a spin, but... with this new car payment, I really can't afford the gas right now!'

College and its economic cost

"Is this to make me feel bad for not getting you that laptop?"

"We were able to retire 6 years early by canceling cable & eliminating anything fun."

"You're a fine one to talk about my spending!"

"Your expense account ain't what it used to be. There's not enough money on your card to cover the $5.35."

Fuel bill gone through the roof

Investing your savings

'I used to work for the Treasury Department, but there's no future in economic forecasts.'

'The good news is we've finally turned the corner. The bad news is, no government bailout.'

"Seriously, you can't balance the budget with cushion change."

"What comes after zillion?"

'Well I've finished the project on time and on budget!' 'Oh, that means I've given you too much time and too much money!'

"Turns that out! - We're supposed to be saving energy!!"

Blowing dust off an order book.

"Alright, alright! I'll stop buying the cheap stuff, OK?"

"Well you said you wanted a simple, cheap solution!" (IT Solutions).

'With 5% spent on talent, 5% on production, and 90% on marketing...I smell WINNER!'

'And finally, a steady decline in earnings has forced us to trim the presentations budget.'

'Carry on sailor, just keep swimming around the coast and stick your head up now and again.'

"The Treasury is fairly sure that the figures in the budget are correct, they might just not be in the right order!"

"No, unfortunately I won't be raising your debt ceiling."

"So, the bills still aren't paid? You've never been good at money management."

'We've gone over your budget very carefully, Mr Thorne. Unfortunately the network does not sell 7-second spots.'

'So the prince and princess lowered their expectations became savvy consumers, then they lived reasonably contented forever after.'

"His department suffered the death of a thousand cuts."

'I don't think we can justify employing a gardener.'

'The diet books really worked for me...I bought so many I couldn't afford any food.'

"The school construction budget is so small we can't even afford to build a snowman."

'This charge is for the office visit, this charge is for blood work, and this charge just about pays off the doc's school loan.'

"With the rises in fuel, food and mortgage I'm going to have to put in some overtime."

'I grow all our tomatoes. I grow all our spinach. All you do is complain about the cost of my twice weekly manicures.'

Squeezing a tight budget...

"He can afford a bigger cage. His old tax forms line the bottom."

'So, who's first?'