Budget Savant Pillows

'I've spoken to my accountant. . . Looks like you need an operation.'

"Gas. Regular. Premium. Super. You don’t want to know."

"Forget the allowance - I need a benefactor!"

"I'm on a tight budget. Make it look like I cut at myself."

"Ultimately, we realized we share too many app subscriptions not to make it work."

'We need people who dream the impossible dreams - like pensions and health care.'

'That's where they keep all the money I don't have anymore.'

'Our new simplified energy bills just have a few options starting with 'Grossly inflated' and progressing to the premium 'Bloodsucker' package. . .'

RRSP once stood for Registered Retirement Savings Plan, now stands for Really, Really Small Potatoes!

'What if we televise government budget hearings and make them pay-per-view?'

Overdraft limit.

'As a rationalization specialist I actually have a concept to cut our deficit quickly and effectively - Just do a head stand'!

"We've got a new financial advisor. I asked him how to cut down on out of pocket expenses and he said to stop wearing clothes with pockets."

'I said we've got to lift up our numbers! I did not say to turn a loss of 150.000,- into a loss of 280.000,-!!'

'Turn we women loose in the malls - that'll stimulate the economy.'

Piggy Bank ATM

'It's your debt to society.'

'The operation we want you to do is to remove 25 from our budgets.'

"Yes dear. But, I don't think you're actually supposed to dispose of your disposable income."

"This is a third-year medical student. To cut costs, your insurance company dismissed the surgeon."

'The forever stamps I purchased at 42 cents are now 44 cents. That's an annual apprciation of 2 which is more than you earned on your investment portfolio.'

Now hiring: crowdfunding expert to reduce the US budget deficit.

Security/Savings

"... And how are you enjoying the cheapest bottle of wine on the menu?"

"There's no getting away from the numbers....only by forgetting holidays, giving up drink, the cinema, meals out and socialising...will we be able to afford any quality of life when we retire."

Husband dismayed to get cold mutton for dinner again. Wife comments that someone must be economical on the housekeeping money she is given.

Take one Per Day as Affordable.

'Of course, that bid's just an estimate.'

"And when you've saved up enough money, what are you going to say in in your full-page ad in the New York Times?"

"Wow, they want $10,000!"

Sam's Nation Building

"The procedure was a complete success. We removed all of your money."

Economic Experts

'I'd like to stay and watch. It usually cuts the bill by 30%.'

Senior Brand Name Medicine Cabinet