Budget-friendly Enthusiast Pillows

Wine Selection 'Here we are. Our cheapest house wine. Would the gentleman care to smell the twisty cap?'

'We are entering an era of thrift, so in place of champagne and canapes, there will be a jumble sale.'

'And I want that end table for $40...' When bargain hunters crack.

'No, you can't just watch the end of Bargainhunt!'

"He doesn't fiscally stimulate me anymore."

Online Shopping.

'Let's go home and come back next year. It's Ground Hog Deficit!'

DIY marriage counseling.

'They never quite finished it - it was probably over budget.'

The spend is high

"I'm afraid your allowance didn't survive the latest round of budget cuts."

'I like the jib of their cuts.'

"Why pay for a tree in November when you can get one off the side of the road in January for free?"

Family planning - 'I was thinking something low maintenance.'

'You're clearly not well, just keep taking these until we run out of them.'

"They weren't doing a two for one on moisturisers, low fat yogurt or muesli then!!"

We don't have a budget to redo the last guy's business cards, door placard, and so on, so would you mind assuming his identity in the meantime?

'Of course, that bid's just an estimate.'

"Could you hold off clipping your coupons until I've finished reading the paper?"

"There is such a thing as a free lunch-it just tastes bad."

'With the price of petrol, I had to take on a second job to pay for the petrol to drive to my first job!'

"He's given up trying to find anything else he can cut to reach 40% savings."

"There's no getting away from the numbers....only by forgetting holidays, giving up drink, the cinema, meals out and socialising...will we be able to afford any quality of life when we retire."

Bargains

How to make sure he won't see his shadow.

"Why can't you just buy some modern LED lights?"

"But if we didn't measure things we wouldn't know how good we were at measuring the things that we're measuring!"

"Oh no. It's another death caused by 'economy pack syndrome'!"

I brake for all 50 off Sales.

sale

Final clearance sale.

Tony Blair - EU budget.

'We've all had to cut costs a smidge.'

"I don't need one, Gracie. My shopping list is very simple! Things I have a coupon for and things that are on sale!"

Garage Sales Anonymous