Budget Crisis Buff Pillows

White House Garage Sale.

"Basically, your new job here at the Treasury Department implementing the bailout is simple, Grayson, just grab and armful of money and run..."

'I used to work for the Treasury Department, but there's no future in economic forecasts.'

"Seriously, you can't balance the budget with cushion change."

"What comes after zillion?"

'Do you remember the good old days when April 15 was the only 'fiscal cliff' people worried about?'

'And finally, a steady decline in earnings has forced us to trim the presentations budget.'

'With 5% spent on talent, 5% on production, and 90% on marketing...I smell WINNER!'

'Carry on sailor, just keep swimming around the coast and stick your head up now and again.'

'So the prince and princess lowered their expectations became savvy consumers, then they lived reasonably contented forever after.'

Where tax money goes...

"So, the bills still aren't paid? You've never been good at money management."

"The Treasury is fairly sure that the figures in the budget are correct, they might just not be in the right order!"

Your tax $ at WAR.

"I'm at that awkward stage between credit card payments and alimony payments."

'We've gone over your budget very carefully, Mr Thorne. Unfortunately the network does not sell 7-second spots.'

'What if we televise government budget hearings and make them pay-per-view?'

Overdraft limit.

"There's so much money around now we've started using it as toilet paper."

"The government's finance settlement is coming out really late this year!"

"The school construction budget is so small we can't even afford to build a snowman."

'I grow all our tomatoes. I grow all our spinach. All you do is complain about the cost of my twice weekly manicures.'

Financial Execution

Gentleman, things are worse than we thought.

'Psst. It's okay in here, but don't go around calling $690 billion 'chump change.''

The Department Chairs react to the budget cuts.

Osbourne plans for another 'Giveaway' Budget

"He can afford a bigger cage. His old tax forms line the bottom."

Squeezing a tight budget...

"With the rises in fuel, food and mortgage I'm going to have to put in some overtime."

-"Why bother to budget?" -"So we can worry BEFORE we spend our money as well as AFTER we spend our money."

"We can probably just about afford to run the pilot-light."

'You can't sit like that all the way through the Budget.'

Because of our tightening budget, I had to turn off the lights at the end of the tunnel.