Budget Balancing Act Gifts

'Faster than the average professional athlete goes bankrupt.'

'Sorry you can't claim your 60 inch TV as a business expense.'

'I must warn you; reading your bill may cause heart palpitations,cold sweat,stomach cramps,nausea...'

'Did I say billions? I meant jillions.'

'We've got to think about our lending policy for small businesses... Like my tailor!'

If you don't mind, we'll work through lunch...

'...just robbing peter to pay paul...what's up with you?'

"He's given up finding any more savings from the schools budget. . ."

Power/Expenditures

"I don't see how we can carry on without making some major sacrifices. . ."

"We seem to be spending more on defence than on things to defend"

'The meek shall inherit the debt. The rich shall inherit the loopholes.'

"Your wonderful daughter and I would like to become engaged in F.Y. '97, married in F.Y. '98, and if the numbers look good, start a family in F.Y. '99."

'Can we afford you to save us money by repairing the car yourself...?'

"Microwave to replace gas or oil central heating?" "Yes. Think how cheap it is to microwave a cup of tea!"

'There will be no raises this year since the state now has a lottery.'

Cycling with a harp case

"First break since 2008."

Expenses/Income. "Our only problem is working out how to switch these."

'Sorry, that was before the fed raised the interest rates.'

State Budget.

Al's Farm Equipment: Our Prices Can't Be Beat!

'Do you remember the good old days when April 15 was the only 'fiscal cliff' people worried about?'

The good news is that I've got all the figures...the BAD news is that I'm not sure what order to put them in!

'I cut myself slashing the budget!'

Help!!! I've been kidnapped - Your Money.

"I asked my friends over to see how much the adults are leaving us to pay off!"

'How can they call it a shared sacrifice in this bad economy...when your pay cut was 10% and mine, 25%?!'

'Office of not much budget, and even less management! Yomp speaking!'

The Costs Of Doing War.

'We're waiting for an estimate that doesn't make him do that.'

IRS, 'It might make you feel better if you just think of it as a negative entitlement.'

"Yes, you do get your bonus today. My assistant is empty the change out of the vending machine as we speak."

The ways and means committee reaches the tipping point.

"...And this is Mable, who will assist me with the billing."