British Monarchy Pillows

Elizabeth I says: 'You've named one of the American colonies after me? I can't wait to visit Betty!'

Prince Philip

A rare picture of Henry VIII's divorce lawyer.

Meghan Markle gives birth to a Baby Boy

Gogglebollox: Our Queen at 90

Queen Elizabeth

William III

Queen Mary II

Kate Middleton

Queen Elizabeth overtakes Victoria as longest reigning monarch on September 9th, 2015

King Arthur on the lake trying to open letters when the lady of the lake offers a letter opener.

"Before you chop off my head, don't you think we should see a counsellor?"

'Sire, Sodom and Gomorrah are requesting Federal disaster relief aid.'

Ernie Studios. Hi, Ernie. What movies are you working on? We have a script about astronauts marooned on a planet filed with talking gorillas who are in hard economic times. I think I'll call it "The Apes of Wrath"! We're casting "Reignman." The central character is a savant monarch. And we're filming a movie about a suburban town populated by women with strange, long hair ... It's called "The Stepford Weaves."

"Well how about that. . . Lady Godiva bought a Harley!"

King Henry and his Cheshire bride

'You can just forget about the cake.'

'I guess it's not much consolation but I thought your impersonation of the King was a riot.'

"I need a little more drama like a ten part mini-series."

'At this rate I'll end up with more heirs than hairs!'

'Don't look at me like that! You're the one who wanted to live in a bouncy castle!'

"It's a cage. It's gilded, and I love it."

The Grasshopper's Feast: A Prophetic Vision

'Don't be silly- of course you're going into the family business!'

"Based on the feedback from advisers whom I haven't beheaded, all of my ideas are great."

King George I

'How about a game of cards?'

TV jester.

'This vacation, let's go on something OTHER than a power trip.'

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: Dead Cat Crown Jewels

'Fancy you doing a curtsey and she being a non-serving royal, you big dope!'

'Did you bark, M'Lady?'

'You've made a powerful enemy'

"She wishes to range free!"

'The Burrito King.'