Brief Dater T-Shirts

'The guy I met speed-dating invited me on a 15-minute second date.'

"...and someone with no fleas. Anything else?"

"Yes, I'm from London. 'Which part?' you ask. Well all of me!"

'It was love at first sight, although he was very pixilated and I was out of focus'

On my list of outdoor pursuits I put skinny dipping way ahead of this.

"She's in a conversationally induced coma."

"Sure, it's more efficient. But I still miss shooting the arrows."

Online Dating

Kissable Frogs in Your Area

'Of all the women who responded to my dating profile, you had the best emoticon.'

Sally and Doug had met online and were proving to be very compatible...

'I was attracted to you but your online photo, but now that I've seen you in High-Def...'

"That guy I just met is already texting me pictures of his plumage."

"And I never kiss in the first two seconds."

"Ooo... she sounds nice... 'I enjoy burying myself in the sand and sideways walks on the beach.'"

"Don't take this the wrong way, Howard, but I'd like to go back to having an on-line relationship."

'Okay, but not in person -- I prefer on-line dating.'

"The last time I was in Europe was 4 boyfriends ago..."

'I'm sorry, Jason. I don't date anyone new until I've googled them.'

'Take this stick-drive and open the file 'John's Emotional Baggage'. It'll save a lot of time.'

"Sorry, had to barf real quick... so where were we?"

"She says you sound like 'fun'!"

"I thought you did a great job with your gender neutral statements ... There will be a second date."

"This isn't working. We have nothing in common."

"Romeo,Romeo. Are you online,Romeo"

'Speed dating really works! Our first date was Friday, we married on Saturday, and now I'm happily single again.'

Financially Secure Romantic with sufficient fire in belly seeks damsel in distress...

"I'm not very good at sex, but what do you say to eight hours uproarious sleep?"

'Let's do lunch.'

We met online.

"What do you mean asking you to marry me via text wasn't romantic? Did you see the emoji with hearts for eyes I attached?"

"So, do you walk the talk? Replete the tweet? Sext the text?"

"Wow! That guy is REALLY good at 'Speed Dating!'"

'That must be my computer date.'

"We couldn't connect. He kept spouting technobabble, and I, of course, kept coming back with psychobabble."