Breakup Escapades T-Shirts

Ex-Lover's Leap.

He is familiar with the silent swoop of the evening bat.

'He licked all my tongue depressors.'

"Not tonight. The furniture is sentient again."

Dermatology: Journal of Itchcraft.

'I'm going to love having me in Haiti.'

"I always say; 'You don't need to spend a lot of money to have a good time on a first date."

'Know any other bed-time tricks?'

'Two please-and I mean TWO boats!'

"Loved our evening, Lou. Thanks for being rich."

"It's not the timing of our relationship that's wrong. It's the lighting."

Six arms, no waiting.

"No, son, there's no severance package."

"Have you got any after ten tours for people who never get up before eight-thirty?"

I need a Valentine card that proclaims undying love but doesn't commit me to anything.

"I dreamt I was on a desert island with seven starving women."

'Not now, Lord!'

When packing for a weekend with Enid, Chad allowed for all kinds of emotional weather.

Fourplay.

'Let's go somewhere where I can be alone.'

"I broke it off with him when I realized his love of quinoa was but a sham."

'I love our hideaway. I only wish I could find it.'

"You're not much of a romantic, are you?"

Newly married couple on a magic carpet.

"Gee, I'm sorry this had to happen on our first date!"

'...How could your wife possibly know we're in Venice?'

"If my dad asks where we met just say 'on holiday'."

'Don't tell anybody, but I have a date tonight with a rogue agent.'

'It was so romantic. The sun, the sea, the mud.'

Non-smoking. Do you have a footsies section and a non-footsies section?

Site Safety: Minutes Since Last Accident.

"Isn't it great that even with our busy schedules we still make the time to just be together and talk about everything else we should bet getting done?"

'I found it in the Khama Sutra...it's an old indian bondage trick.'

"You should have told me you needed advice."

"Sorry, but I never get a girls name tattooed, on a first date!"