Breaking News Fan Pillows

'Breaking news. . . I've just found out my wife has left me.'

"And just like that, e got rid of Florida."

"I love it when you use your 'All Things Considered' voice."

'So it's with a heavy heart that I leave you good people of St. Paul's and accept the calling to be minister at the Sunnydell Nudist Colony...'

"My goodness, if I'd known how badly you wanted democracy I'd have given it to you ages ago."

"Our next story should interest all our viewers...it's a real can of worms."

'Mixed day on Wall Street. Economic indicators were up, but executive bonuses were down.'

'Henry was an undecided voter four years ago when he entered that voting booth, and I'm still waiting for him to decide and come home.'

NSA - 'Start Leakin'.'

Fiscal cliff

Negative Interest Meeting

US recommendation for Middle East peacemaking.

Pop star weather report.

"To show you how committed the company is to ending this strike, we are moving operations to Mexico."

A fake news reader amongst a series of real newscasts.

"A man threatens to destroy town with army of turtles after dispute with city hall. Local authorities initiate a shell-ter in place in preparation for the noc-turtle invasion."

Not Moses

'The market goes up, the market goes down. And that's our business report.'

"My real money comes from my TV news appearances predicting stock market rises and falls."

"In financial news, Greek shares continue their slide. Of note, International Feta Cheese continues to crumble."

'We've got to stop him watching Robert Peston.'

'Police have counted the dead resulting from today's disaster. However, they suspect that some of these victims may be just playing possum.'

'That was the worst performance I've ever seen.'

The Flip Side of the Question.

The EU as a sinking ship.

'I know you purchased the stock at fifty and now it's ten, and they filed for bankruptcy, but let's not read too much into that.'

Up-to-the-minute reporting from our man on the street.

New to podcasts? Choose a genre!

Matt Gaetz's Impeachment Stall Tactics

Stable Genius

Greek Crisis