Bounce Rate Buster Gifts

'Just like the website, lots of visitors, few conversions.'

"My granddaughter's first words to me were 'OK, Boomer.' I have no idea what that even means."

A female patient in an exam room sees a sign that reads, 'Break glass in case of physician burnout'

'Wake me up when he doesn't use a buzzword.'

'I admire your floatibility.'

'Your husband? He's just leaving...'

Even more of what people say (and what they really mean)

Please buzz off. That's my flower!

'The bigger they are... The harder they hit!'

Brew 'N' Brouhaha

'Ready for your bonus, Bob?'

What Business People often say (and what they really mean)

"I wish someone would come and turn the vibrating buzzer off on that mobile phone!"

Pub restrooms; Thugs - Thugettes

"We must kill this initiative, so let's mainstream it."

Inhospitality tent.

Exhausted employee

"Watch out for Brian...he's a bit of a bruiser."

You have had enough

After party at the spill club.

'If congress regulates obscene bonuses, isn't that a violation of the first amendment?'

'My work-lifestyle balance is shot, I'm either working or I'm dead!'

"Trying to unclutter my life by reducing busyness is taking up all my free time!"

"Marie, forward all my calls – I’m working on an ulcer from home today."

Club insecurity.

Gads. I've forgotten today's buzzword.

"Or we could go to the exhibition chronicling in depth, the development of the hip hop scene..."

"That's an old photo."

'Do you get the feeling that, in educational workshops, there are way too many buzzwords thrown around?'

'We have a strict dress code. Can't let you in without a straightjacket and tie.'

"Sorry Sir, no hoodies."

Bouncer at the door of family reunion.

"Oh, we're not bouncers. We just can't fit through the door."

"What out... this guy's always gatecrashing events for free booze."