Bounce Rate Buster Gifts

'Just like the website, lots of visitors, few conversions.'

"My granddaughter's first words to me were 'OK, Boomer.' I have no idea what that even means."

A female patient in an exam room sees a sign that reads, 'Break glass in case of physician burnout'

'Wake me up when he doesn't use a buzzword.'

'I admire your floatibility.'

Even more of what people say (and what they really mean)

'Your husband? He's just leaving...'

Please buzz off. That's my flower!

'The bigger they are... The harder they hit!'

Brew 'N' Brouhaha

'Ready for your bonus, Bob?'

What Business People often say (and what they really mean)

Pub restrooms; Thugs - Thugettes

"I wish someone would come and turn the vibrating buzzer off on that mobile phone!"

"We must kill this initiative, so let's mainstream it."

Inhospitality tent.

Exhausted employee

After party at the spill club.

You have had enough

'If congress regulates obscene bonuses, isn't that a violation of the first amendment?'

"Watch out for Brian...he's a bit of a bruiser."

'My work-lifestyle balance is shot, I'm either working or I'm dead!'

"Trying to unclutter my life by reducing busyness is taking up all my free time!"

Club insecurity.

"Marie, forward all my calls – I’m working on an ulcer from home today."

"Or we could go to the exhibition chronicling in depth, the development of the hip hop scene..."

I'm sorry, Miss. I can't involve the bouncer just to "teach somebody a lesson." Menu.

Gads. I've forgotten today's buzzword.

"That's an old photo."

'Do you get the feeling that, in educational workshops, there are way too many buzzwords thrown around?'

'We have a strict dress code. Can't let you in without a straightjacket and tie.'

Bouncer at the door of family reunion.

"Sorry Sir, no hoodies."

'I heard you got a job at that new club. It must be great."

"What out... this guy's always gatecrashing events for free booze."