Bought First Home Pillows

'How can our light bill be so big? We see in the dark.'

Girl who can't cook meets guys who can't fix stuff.

"I'd better enjoy this while I can. It's the only home I'll own without a mortgage!"

"I'm afraid the price would make him toss and turn all night for months!"

"I always thought of my childhood home as being larger."

Moving in

"We balanced our budget this month!"

"Well, we're down to bare brick, natural wood, and raw nerves."

'You had to put a skylight in didn't you?'

"Son, one day two hundred square feet of this city could be yours to rent."

"Sold For sale Ellie Kopp 1-800-238-7463 Yaffle Realty Stop renting. Buy your boot from a boot."

"May I recommend THIS property? It's ideal for first-time haunters..."

"Do you prefer the tile engineered to look like wood, or the wood engineered to look like tile?"

"Yes, we’d like to buy a grow house." "Chia Pet’s first purchase."

'C'mon! Speed it up! I've got a bottle of wine here that says it's meant to be drunk soon!'

Estate Agent showing client his parents' house - '...and here's one from our affordable homes range'

'Oh look, the tide is coming in.'

"Mom, could we stay in my old room until we're able to afford a place of our own?"

"Mom said mopping up my snow tracks is a good start for my bucket list."

'We do have a property in your price range, but we need a time machine to go back and visit it!'

'And the funniest part is I made Frank go out and buy a new, $5,000 fridge, just to hold a $4.00 bottle of wine!'

'They're playing house.'

"To be honest, I'd be stupid not to take advantage of the market."

"It's a great Fixer-Upper and this is Ken, single, available and a pretty decent handyman."

Starter Homes

'We're starting to build our own house. How much is this two by four?'

"The clothes looked extra dirty... so I used the whole box of detergent!"

Hello, Mr. and Mrs. Sebum! I think you'll love this property on the left side of the chin. It's a wonderful place to start a pimple."

"There's nothing like new carpeting to freshen up a place, I say."

House hunting is cruel.

'New in town, hey? Let me show you a great condo tower.'

'It looked a lot bigger in the photos.'

'How much?! You can't be serious: It's a hole in a tree!'

'And, as you can see, it is the perfect place to start a big family...'

"This looks intersting. Three bedrooms, two and a half scratching posts..."