Bottle Savant Pillows

Bottle Bank. . .

"Your usually vicious sarcasm is weak. Go pump some irony."

"I come here for the pepper."

New Suit.

What are you in the mood to get confused watching tonight?

"Statins. I got statins. Who needs statins?"

"Finally a perfume store my husband will enjoy visiting."

"Forget the allowance - I need a benefactor!"

"I grabbed it away from Larry and seasoned it properly just in time. It's a rescue meatloaf."

Dress for Success suit shop: 'Can I pay you for it later, after I get successful?'

Statue of Liberty and Hand Sanitizer

'That's the new guy. He writes our 'shuck-and-jive' press releases.'

Tie Rolls

"I use old Duke to check my steaks. If it feels like Duke's tongue, it's rare, if it feels like his ear, it's medium. . ."

"It's a nice halo and all, but I'm not sure it matches my outfit."

"This IS my day-to-night outfit"

The Tragedy of Prosperity

"It's just a beginning, I suppose, but I'm feeling really good about my clothes."

Choosing What To Wear.

'Now that's what I call a beautiful fit.'

GURLERS

"Remember, son, you can be anything you want to be...except for maybe an aroma therapist."

"No this is timeless classic menswear appreciation. Hipster beatnik is Tuesday nights."

"Everything I do I do with panache. I even say panache with panache."

"Now, how many of you liked the viola player best?"

"You'll have to imagine the melody for this next song too."

"When's the last time you shaved, little buddy?"

"I think your tailor has seriously miscalculated your rise, Herbert."

"Would you like your real size or one that artificially inflates your ego?"

It's not a love bite, I just play the violin.

'Someday I hope he grows up into a sports bottle...just like his father.'

'Leonard was pleased with his bouffant mane from The Precious Roar.'