Bossiness Survivor Gifts

"Look, who's driving this car, you or your mum?"

'If I had to use one word to describe our strategy.'

"The good news is you’re the only one we’re not firing ... the bad news is you’re the only one to run the department."

IN box...OUT is wastepaper basket on fire.

"You've proven your worth a hundred times over. Let's try for a thousand."

Three gates of hell: marriage counseling, investments, company meetings

'I like the way you handle responsibility, McWit, so I'm going to blame some stuff on you.'

'A few more years in this job and you'll learn how to delegate stress.'

'Sorry, suffering from burnout return in a week.'

"I'd like a week off without any business related e-mail on my home computer."

'I can't control my anger when people get too close to my kids...'

"They've hiked up our targets again...I'm going to have to put in some overtime to have any chance of meeting them!"

Some days at work can be more challenging than others.

"Just keep quiet and listen to what we have to say."

Fight or Flight

Another day at work would be one too many...

"Lost my job. But I'm pretty sure it's around here somewhere."

'Wake me up when he doesn't use a buzzword.'

'Calling Tech Support does NOT count as one of my wishes!'

In and Out Tray

"I feel your pain."

"Bill's a little upset. The boss just chewed him out."

"Don't worry about missing the meeting, Henshaw. We assigned all the actions to you."

The number one injury in today's workplace: severe bends caused by repeated exposure to deep-dive presentations.

Your Work/Life Balance Is Off. Shall I Auto-Correct?

'Who wants to work late again, raise your hands.'

"Well, all the symptoms of just another typical case of burnout, I'm afraid."

"We offer a generous flex time policy - you can work your 90 hours per week any way you'd like."

'Your main goal in this job is getting out alive.'

'I want to empower you to fulfill your potential! If you can work 16 hours today, then your 20-hours shift tomorrow should really elevate your self-esteem'!

"I'm too busy to be stressed."

Danger Slow Sand.

"Just heading out for a good cry, care to join me?"

Stressed employee says to colleague: 'I think I'm on top of the situation and I hope I'm in the loop, but I can't seem to get ahead of the curve.'

'I'm glad you're able to be with us more, but I'd appreciate it if you'd say you're 'spending time' with us, not 'doing time' with us.'