Bookstore Managers Gifts

Failed Alliance.

'That's it then - I'll take the slinky high-heeled cocktail number in a 5 and the everyday workshoe in a 7...'

Books: Novels, Short-Stories, Tall Tales.

"Meet the embellisher 3-5 pm"

'I didn't dedicate my book, A Lifetime of Wine Tasting, to my 3 ex-wives and nine kids, because they made it possible. I did it because they made it necessary.'

"Tonight! Author book signing." "Develop your inner raging bitch."

The Dorrie Decimal System

"Excuse me, I'm here to do some sole searching."

"Not to be a motion picture - will remain just a book'

Little dog in Romance section in bookstore under sign: 'Puppy Love'

'Mysteries' section of bookshop reveals secret door.

Woman blowing dust off book 'Desert Romance'

I hate deer! What do you have to repel them? They're awful. I've got fences. Sprays. Decoys. Tree's Tree Nursery. I'll takes these. Anything to get rid of the varmints. Ring him up, Twig. I don't know why you are so down on deer. They've been very good to you! Anti-deer.

'Charlotte's Website' ('The children's book classic rewritten for the electronic era!')

Shop struggles to sell books about recession: '90 per cent off on all credit crunch books' (Titles incluude: Beat the Crunch! Who's to Blame? We're all Doomed!)

'...then Johannes Gutenberg built the first bookcase'

'If you're having trouble finding what you want, try our other store--'Cabernet Sauvignons Starting with the Letter B'.'

Charles Darwin Book Signing.

Author of 'The Big Pop-up Book' popping up out of a folding table.

Muhammad Ali publishes a popup book.

'Perhaps Sallie had made her bookshop too comfortable'

"International best seller! It's just a squirrel."

"It's felt to be his most thought provoking work."

'We're pushing our do-it-yourself kit, today, sir - a ream of paper and a half-dozen pencils.'

'Meet the author with her collaborators'

Rodin's Browser

Never tell the boss "You can count on me" during inventory.

'Bread, milk, cereal, sugar, sausage, potatoes, beans, biscuits. Click! So easy, but I do miss the sexy till lady.'

Bookstore. The Stock Market for Dummies. It's either an instructional guide or a history of recent economics.

Self Help / Elf Help.

"Store policy is that I need a note from your wife."

'Have you got the book 'After the end of the world'?'

Man browsing books see couple kissing in romance section of book store.

"Midtown Vinyl. Vintage albums + EPs. Midtown Ink. Vintage books + newspapers."

Toys were me: lessons learned never growing up