Bookshelf Aficionados Pillows

"Yup, looks like your bookcase is full. You might want to start thinking about getting a new one."

Victor Hugo

Reading my Critics

"I try to write a little bit every day."

'Stuck on a desert island, in the middle of the ocean, with only a palm tree for company, it's a bloody joke.'

Charles Darwin Book Signing.

"'How We Die' - fabulous!"

"Hmm...I can see a best-selling book and a movie deal out of this..."

'Meet the author with her collaborators'

"No—You're thinking dog years—Editor years are twice as many."

What Harper Lee's REALLY been up to all these years

'He was a great writer'

Tequila Mockingbird

'Sorry, Marx, but your writing ability doesn't meet our needs.'

'He wrote a whole book on how to play a slot machine. I'm anxious for his next one: How to Set an Alarm Clock.'

"That was too many fresh original voices for one night."

'According to this, you owe $57.32 in late fees for the book 'Getting By on a Shoestring Budget'.'

So You've Cloned Yourself

'How about having at least one character who's alive and wearing clothes?'

"You'd be angry, too, if your alter ego was a successful physician."

'Publshing Books for Dummies.'

"There goes our early night."

Meet the author

Monster Self-Help

Thomas Keneally

"Do you think Trump has read 'Contemporary Relativism and the Death of Meaning'?"

'Gifted class, indeed. One is gifted in science, but he can't read - one is gifted in reading, but won't even try math...'

"We'd like to publish it, do nothing to promote it, and watch it disappear from the shelves in less than a month."

"In this one, references to everything have been deleted."

Learn yourself English.

Meet the author Billy Bovine.

'Do you have this in a smaller size?'

The joy of sects.

Professor McWit, crushed by an avalanche of Philosophy 101 texts, proves again that a little knowledge is a dangerous thing.

Bibliomaniac