Bookish Meltdown Master Pillows

How to spot the early signs of Book Fair meeting meltdown.

Audio Books

'If you don't chill out, you are definitely heading for a meltdown...!'

"I don't consider a missing four million dollars to be 'monkeyshines'."

Tesla Shares Tanking Into Swastika

'Back in the day, you could leverage . . .'

'Oh, Wow! You write math books? That's wonderful! Where do you get your ideas?'

Saul Bellow

"Your manuscript is utter trash, of course. How does a half-million first printing sound to you?"

'Investments in money funds increased this month on news it TAKES money to MAKE money.'

Don't worry, when it's time to start jumping out of windows I'll tell you.

"How do I load this book into my computer?"

Money Hog

'Look on the bright side -- we could still be in the MARKET.'

"A local retail survey shows holiday sales were flat...but the consumer cash meter hit an all-time high...while the holiday confidence index took a three-point dip."

"Have you seen my toothbrush dearest?"

"That book was so cliche. Can you believe the butler actually did it?"

'Borrow 50p? Sorry, I'm staying out of the sub-prime lending market.'

Coffee Table eBooks.

What's that? It's my second published book. It's called "The Official Biography of Rudy Park, the Loser Who Allegedly Works at My Local Café and Spends All His Free Time Doing Nothing on the Internet." It's just a bunch of empty pages. I know. Very meta, right?

Man Puts His Seatbelt on for a Literary Journey

Man uses a television to hold up his book.

'He learnt it all from a book - 'Play Like Boris Becker'.'

'You mailed my wife a pre-approved credit card, so now I have to kill you.'

State of ye art pop-up technology

"Get J. D. Salinger on the horn for me!"

"...and this is the library..."

"This is Mr. Burke—he's a non-bank banker."

"Never sell your hotels and try to choose the tiny hat."

Joker Financial Consultant

Girl and book

"First, you told me you gave up robbing banks. Second, as your accountant, you might want to omit that income."

Who's D'oh

"This symposium has gotten completely out of hand!"

Library with giant books.