Bookish Boss T-Shirts

"Get J. D. Salinger on the horn for me!"

'That large, rolled up newspaper is a reminder - mess up in this office and you'll pay the price.'

"For just one monkey in front of one typewriter you've come up with some amazing stuff."

Cook in the cookery section.

'Hang on, I've just found another one. It must've fallen down behind the coffee machine.'

Hats: Management/Good Job/Friendly but Aloof.

LEMONADE 50 CENTS, NOW HIRING, 'Okay, you're hired -- now, I want you to forget everything you learned in pre-school.'

"Jenkins, come in and pull up a bean bag."

Giant to librarian: 'Excuse me, do you have a large print version?'

'Oh, Wow! You write math books? That's wonderful! Where do you get your ideas?'

"Ah, Stevens—sit anywhere."

Self-Employment

'The Buck (after taxes) Stops Here.'

Dog Bookends

Academics at the Beach

Pathology.

"Your manuscript is utter trash, of course. How does a half-million first printing sound to you?"

'Now, now, Mancini, we all have to start somewhere!'

"If that book is gonna deposit hundreds of grains of sand in our bed later tonight, it better be damn juicy."

Book in library - 'Crash tests for dummies' (being read by a crash test dummy).

"Baldo, have you finished your homework?"

"Shh, too much racket."

Updated Classic: Treasury Island

"That book was so cliche. Can you believe the butler actually did it?"

"If that book is gonna deposit hundreds of grains of sand into our bed later tonight, it better be damn juicy."

Coffee Table eBooks.

Bob's decision to replace the sales team with hotcakes really paid off.

"I'm working harder than I ever have, but all I get out of it is larger and larger paychecks."

Man Puts His Seatbelt on for a Literary Journey

"Who said 'I love the sea'?"

"... And thanks to Henderson's brilliant idea to economize on heating costs, he's saved the company hundreds of pounds!"

"Honey, this is that new accounting team I was telling you about. Due to certain irregularities on my part, they'll be taking the house, the car and a couple of the kids."

Girl and book

'What's the point of spending twenty bucks to buy a frame to display my first dollar?'

Internal Revenue Service, Fraud Division. Are you in?