Body Improvement Believer Gifts

Image changing.

"I hurt a lot of people during my last twelve steps."

"Empty again? What's going on around here anyway?"

'Reach up and fold down into Uttanasa.' - 'Notice how you feel both physically and spiritually.' - 'Physically, I feel that my toenails are a bit too long.' - 'Hmmm... okay, what about spiritually?'

"I don't care what it was or how hard it was to kill. It makes me look fat."

'Hey, look. This anti hair loss treatment is finally working. My hair's stopped falling out!'

Scales

'It makes you look fifty years younger.'

'Call me a cockeyed optimist but I still believe big executive bonuses and perks can buy happiness.'

"Take. Your. Time!"

Arnold Schwarzenneger caricature.

Wearing bras in 2020.

'It's simple, really. This line stays high and sets a good example for the other line.'

"It's all very well for people to go on about restraining hedge fund managers...but they have not idea of what we do!"

"It was a mixed dayon wall street. Stocks were down, but bonuses were up."

Woman and scales.

'I think they're still just sizing each other up.'

That gut! Why can't I lay off the nuts?? I fly funny. I really do. My voice is so annoying. Self-mockingbird.

1. Wealthy people will consider hiring others to do their exercise for them. They should not give in to this temptation, as studies have shown that this seriously slows down any truly serious body-building campaign. 2. The key word in isometrics is balance. Be sure every part of your body shares in the fun equally and you will be able to avoid awkward developments.

'You know that thin person inside you, struggling to get out? -- He seems to have gained weight, too.'

"So does this Flamingo diet have any side effects?"

"I need to get back in the gym."

"I figured I'd start with one love handle and if you liked it, go for the pair."

I'm sorry, they don't make dresses large on the inside and small on the outside!

'Does my bum bag look big in this'

"Great grunts, next week we'll try some weights."

"Personally I don't think our salaries are too high - I see them as legitimate compensation for the emotional trauma we suffer due to the public's disdain for our high salaries."

'Ben, that's what I hate about this crowded gym... there's no freedom of the bench press.'

Man standing on weighing scales in his bathroom

"If governments didn't think banks were worth saving we would not be worth our bonuses..."

'What happened mom? I thought you were on a low-carb diet?'

"What do you think it is?... It's your, fat cat bonus."

SCHWARZENEGGER HIS BACK

"Well, okay. Let's suppose that it's normal for your unborn baby to be three stone. You'd still be 18lbs overweight."

'Hey, come on -- You've got to believe in yourself!'