Boardroom Yogi T-Shirts

'It's easy, Greg. Just get in touch with your inner regional sales manager.'

"Do you guys serve beer?"

'To close the deal, I had to make some minor concessions.'

Executive gym with briefcases for weights.

"I'm trying to achieve total harmony of body, mind and cashflow."

'Do you really think shoulder-to-wheel and nose-to-grindstone are valid yoga positions?'

"And I'm sure no one will mind if we fold a few clothes while we talk."

'We have to move - they're putting in a cell phone tower up here.'

"In preparation for his appearance before the foundation board, Rodney fine-tunes his song and dance."

'We were able to make a quick alliance together because of common insecurities.'

"I now propose a 5 minute break so we can confide with our dogs."

"…Ommmmmmmmmmmmmoooooney, heh, heh, …ommmm…"

The wetsuit preferred by 9 out of 10 executive windsurfers.

"I've had a lot of free time this year."

"Before I continue past my opening joke, I want to know if she is laughing or crying."

Transcendental Litigation

'So the yoga classes are working out pretty well for you then?'

Can you do it so my eyes follow everyone around the boardroom?

'Thanks to your Yoga classes, my usual state of catatonic stupor is easily mistaken for deep deliberation.'

'It has to be understandable, Higbe. A code of ethics is not actually to be written in code.'

'Mergers and takeovers and profits, oh my! Mergers and takeovers and profits, oh my! Mergers and. . . '

'The only exercise I believe in is the exercise of power.'

'Consolidation is tearing us apart.'

Yogi Comedy: A yogi comedian tells a yoga joke. '...is this thing aum?'

"Remember, ladies, if you're doing this right, you shouldn't be able to do it."

Downward Dog

"Perkins here, representing taxes."

"Still, I think we should be proud that we did it as a team!"

'Honey, honey. You've got to stop walking and talking in your sleep!'

Okay, now we've got a quorum!

'I've chosen you for fresh, new ideas.'

The sword or the briefcase in the stone

'It's pretty common among cruising executives, Mrs. Johnson... we call it non-jet-lag.'

'Look, we just need to make a few simple decisions. For once, can we do it without an endless squabble over whether we should take the high road or fly under the radar?'