
"Nope, never did a TED Talk or performed on 'The Moth.' I'm Dennis, the fish guy from Price Chopper."
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"Nope, never did a TED Talk or performed on 'The Moth.' I'm Dennis, the fish guy from Price Chopper."
"If nothing else needs welding, Paula, I'm going to lunch."
"I'm going to need a little more for the root cause than, who'da thunk."
Time Out For Teddy
White Collar Crime.
Ponzi-Mat Vending Machine
Bureaucrats held up by the workers.
"White Collar Prison"
“Son, that… ‘some this will all be yours’… is now!”
"Yes, I can use tools, but I realized early on I could earn more money as an accountant..."
"Okay guys you have your assignments. Let's get cracking!"
A deadline comes to chew up a worker.
Hellbillies.
"At first I thought it was just coincidence, then I noticed it corresponded perfectly to your shift."
'This resume is incredible. Would you be able to lie this well under pressure?'
'I don't want to rob the rich anymore, Marian, I want to BE the rich.'
'I've proved to the company I can make the tough rationalizations.'
'As your friend, I'd advise you to leave the country. As your accountant, I advise you to file for bankruptcy.'
"Now we'll all close our eyes and cover our ears, and the person who took the four hundred and twenty-eight million dollars will put it back."
"As your cell bitch, I imagine my Sarbanes-Oxley expertise should come in quite handy."
'Where are you going, I already locked out that pump.' - 'CARL'S on shift!'
Joe's Bar: Gentlemen must wear blue collars.
"I'm getting notes of 2 x 4."
Fraud Squad
"Okay! I know! I'm proud that you have a job and you've set a goal to spend all your money...on a nice lowrider car."
'The company has got flexible working hours. I've got to be on the spot when they need me, that's why they tie me to a tree near the front door after work.'
As you can see we've had to downsize our workforce.
'No, no, I've gone through all the steps in the procedure and I don't see anything about totally immersing yourself in oil before starting the job!!
'You're too late...I embezzled it.'
'Honey! I got promoted to long sleeves!'
"I've never met one, but I hear offices have fire drills."
'You're a legend, sir. We studied you in our criminal justice class.'
". . . but, it will be great to see the old gang."
Job Safety - Safety Goal.
Running after money.
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