Blue Chip Collector Pillows

'Are you looking for something in light blue, or dark blue, chips?'

Dear, could you please pick up some batteries? The ones in the remote are dead and I feel like I'm Amish.

Rudolph goes green (compact flourescent nose)

"Mr Frimley will see you now."

'Ideas.com' desk with a 'come' tray and a 'gone' tray.

'It's the same everywhere: body over brains.'

Teapot

"We were having a great conversation and then someone clapped."

"Sure, it's a break you can live with... but screw one more socket and you're toast!"

Playing cards.

"Would the owner of the 1985 Ford station wagon, license plate METAL-1, please move your car so that the ice-cream truck can get through?"

'Whoa! This was supposed to be an easy merit badge!'

'Hold it Billy - There are no praying mantises in school.'

"Knowing all the weather rock lore doesn't really count toward the weather badge."

Can you mumble, mumble mumble? You're mumbling. What are you saying? I'm asking for your mumble, mumble. You're asking for my help? I can't get the word out. Can I get a little mumble? Mumble.

'I'm not riding with her and that jar of creepy crawlers!!'

Sharp Eyes

'What did the fish say when he swam into the wall?'

"I'm glad I don't have to put gas in it. the downside is that it takes a lot of time to put 3,000 AA batteries in it."

When lice dream.

Vampire laying in his coffin wearing a Smiley badge.

Time Table

Man with candle in thought bubble, "Ideas before Edison"

"Please feel free to browse."

"I'll have the computer running once I workout the bugs."

Ask Sadie

"I've got a chip implant, so if I stray from the neighborhood, I'm a chip off the old block."

"Would you like flies with that order?"

'So glad we ticked the no publicity box.'

"I wonder if this will count for wood carving badge?"

'Well, sure, two pair is nice but nothing beats five singles!'

"I'm not all you can eat? But I brought my special plate!"

Moses comes down the mountain with the first silicon chip.

'Are you sure energy efficient isn't just a nice way of saying you're not too bright?'

'We're confident that morale dips resulting from the recent salary cuts will be offset by the distribution of these smiley face badges to all affected employees.'