Birth Of A Sibling Pillows

'Mom, is the baby my sequel or a spin-off?'

"And I thought I was irreplaceable."

'He doesn't really talk yet, but he does some sound bites.'

'Does this mean I have to share my pocket money?'

'I'd like an older brother, please.'

'No hair or teeth, can't walk or talk -- it's hard to believe we're related.'

'No hair or teeth, can't walk or talk -- he's kind of a starter kit.'

The Role of the Firstborn

'No hair or teeth, can't walk or talk -- he's kind of a starter kit.'

'Mom! -- Jeffrey's having a wardrobe malfunction!'

'No hair or teeth, can't walk or talk -- he's kind of a starter kit.'

'Meet my new little brother. The future 'spoiled little brat'.'

'Are you sure he's my baby brother? He smells effeminate!'

'No hair or teeth, can't walk or talk -- she's kind of a starter kit.'

His real name is Jasper Underwood Farthington III...but we just call him 'Stinky'.

"And then, as soon as I had carved out my niche, they went and had another kid."

"Don't be jealous. This is just a backup kid - in case anything happens to you."

"Can I see his resume?"

'Do it again.'

'Watch out for my little brother -- he's clothing-optional.'

'If a baby's a gift, can we regift it if it's a girl?'

Two boys talking about their mother's new baby

Reflected Glory

"No wonder babies are born screaming. I haven't had a wink of sleep since the exit light came on!"

"Oh,oh - here comes quality time again."

'As you can see, it's a boy and he seems to be doing just fine.'

'I'm about to have a tantrum. What are you doing?'

Groovy Baby

"Once I have the motor skills, I'll be knee deep in pudding every. Damn. Day."

Newborns on cell phones

'I don't like that one. . . how about the one with the cute smile.'

"Mom, when do I get my own room?"

'A boy? Come on, Mom, you can do better than that!'

'Oh look Julia, he's just text me his first word.'

'I never know how much to leave for lunch.'