Birdwatchers With High Hopes T-Shirts

'I appreciate you desire to volunteer with Pilots Without Borders, but being a flightless bird you haven't enough flying hours to qualify with us.'

Children's Parties

Life is for the birds.

Ahh! The sounds of nature! Peep peep. Tweet tweet! Twitter. Croak croak. Sniff sniff. Ribbit. Human nature. Twitter twitter. Tippity tap tap. Cackle cackle! Bleep bleep.

"Congratulations. It's a chick."

"Better start moving towards shelter: the weather forecast is for rain this afternoon..."

Tequila Mockingbird

"You were the one who thought it was too dangerous to raise a child in the big city."

The last Passenger Pigeon

'Since we're being so honest, perhaps I should mention that I liked you better as an egg.'

'Don finally figured out a way to keep the squirrels from getting at the bird feeder.'

'Think about it guys: We're fed and sheltered, why would we ever think about leaving the nest?'

"Those are the lyrics? How embarrassing—I've been singing it wrong this whole time."

"Why on earth do you insist on coming to this miserable, isolated, rocky, small island every year to roost? It's covered in guano! Disgusting..."

"Don't even think about it! I am the property of the English Monarch!"

'Yes, I'm nocturnal, or you could say, a certified daydreamer...'

Paralegal eagle.

"You spoil those pterodactyls!"

"We tried forming a collective - no leader, no structure, no power dynamics - but we just ended up flying in a circle over Winnipeg."

"The groceries are in the car."

'Hang on. Let's not get ahead of ourselves. Apparently that's not a good idea.'

"We wanted to replicate their natural habitat, so we built a housing estate."

'Don't you just love that rap music!'

Flight: Select your spot.

'Something tells me I shouldn't have had these around Easter.'

"These days, everyone is lawyering up."

"Maybe we'd kiss better if we had lips."

"You fly into a window, too?"

'Mom, Dad, this is Jennifer. We met early one morning and fell in love.'

"Take us to your feeder."

Peacekeeping?

"It's the vulture app. It appears when my phone battery is about to die."

'I don't migrate any more. The satellite dish has made the long winter nights quite bearable.'

"I've just been conned out of my dinner by a craft fox!"

'Hey, you're growing fast alright: Your beak capacity has reached three litres!'