Birding Enthusiast Pillows

'Oh great. The Jones replaced their bird bath with a hot tub.'

"You were right---this makes birding way cooler."

'You're lucky. I got ringed in Africa !'

Finally, after years of fruitless searching, McAngus spotted a pair of pin-striped investment bankers in their natural habitat.

"We figured why not make some money while we migrate south."

'The proliferation of bird watchers make me more and more self-conscious...'

Life is for the birds.

"What's that? I asked for a teal lichen. That's a brown thread. Are you trying to upset me?"

"Finches, don't look now, but there's a creepy guy staring at our beaks."

'A burp or a fart, I can excuse, but throwing up a pellet of fur and bones? That's gross dude!'

"You've been so good to us all these years. Is there anything we can do to repay you?"

"When is my next parole hearing?"

"God, I hope no one asks me to sing."

"That's not how I sat on you."

'Since I'm new here, let's start by clearning the air. You may have noticed that I'm short for a C.E.O. . .'

"Now they're referring to us as ecology nuts."

"He could have been the national bird, but that was a long, long time ago."

Papageno from The Magic Flute

Polluted geese

Sign in tree from bird "next appearance 3:00 pm"

Knight feeding his kids.

"Just kick back and enjoy this. These are the nest years of our lives!"

"This has nothing to do with you ... this is between us and the tree."

"Thanks! Carl put his heart and soul into it, along with, of course, lots of mud and a boatload of his own saliva."

"Trust me, you're not ready!"

'You know too much!'

'And when did you have your last owl movement?'

They try, but those crows can't make noises they used to. The lost caws!

Pigeon Little

'I know that bird feeder is guaranteed to be squirrel-proof, but I still think they are getting in there.'

How about going easy on the carbs

So you're a mocking bird...

'Son, it's time we had that little talk about ornithology and entomology.'

"The yellow spotted green bird, eats its body weight in bugs, and mates once every three years."

"Mating dance? Good luck with that. I couldn't even get my husband to do the chicken dance at our wedding."