Bird Watchers' Nemesis Pillows

"That's it, Tom. Here they come. Just keep playing 'Freebird.'"

Vegetarian Birds

"I'd kill for a fresh fruit fritter."

French Early Bird

"Pass that."

"Great tights!"

Elon Musk Ditches Twitter Logo

"You had too many characters in your last tweet."

'Look Dear. The first Robin Hood of spring.'

"These days, everyone is lawyering up."

Chickenspox

"You fly into a window, too?"

'You are pigeon toed.'

Jonathan Bugsy Seagull

'I don't migrate any more. The satellite dish has made the long winter nights quite bearable.'

"All I get is a bird's eye view."

'Do you think anyone will notice my funny hat shaped like a fish?'

'I know you like romantic things, so I built us this love-nest. Stuck together with my own spit.'

'I hear they're going to cable.'

Vegetarian restaurant: 'Two vegetarians please.'

"I'm a bird dog."

'Without running tests I'd say you're eating too much turkey.'

"Who died?"

"Far out Nigel, I know you're a purist, but at some point, you'll need to switch to e-books like the rest of us..."

"That bird looks just like your drone."

The Grim Reaper feeding pigeons arsenic.

'Oh boy, lucky you were there: I was cramping up. I need a few minutes rest if you don't mind...'

The Fifth Annual Crow Convention - "If you ask me, I reckon it looks like a murder!"

Self examination.

"Suddenly I can't think of anything to chirp."

Phlox

Goose Flowchart

"The presentation is dreadful."

"As a harbinger of doom, you're a little late."