Bird Observer T-Shirts

A bird pulls the thread from a magic carpet.

"So son, this is the no-fly zone I was telling you about: although they are trying to shoot clay pigeons, it is safer to avoid the area altogether..."

"When will somebody cut the grass?"

'If there is an unlimited supply of something....mortality is that it make our time finite....I think I'll poop on this guy's head.'

Bird sitting on pool cueball, as though it is an egg.

A Symphony of Penguins

"Thor! I am Thor! Ha. Just kidding. I'm Tom the Seagull."

'The proliferation of bird watchers make me more and more self-conscious...'

'So let me see if I've got it straight. It was a very large squirrel and your husband is a nut.'

"They must be grown-up ducks, because they're eating the crusts too."

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

A baby duck in a tiny car seat on the mother duck's back.

"What's that? I asked for a teal lichen. That's a brown thread. Are you trying to upset me?"

"Finches, don't look now, but there's a creepy guy staring at our beaks."

'A burp or a fart, I can excuse, but throwing up a pellet of fur and bones? That's gross dude!'

"Any idea how long your family might be visiting?"

"You've been so good to us all these years. Is there anything we can do to repay you?"

"When is my next parole hearing?"

"The fish sticks here are very good."

"Do me next."

Bird feeding chick that is nesting in a knight's helmet

'Why don't you just pull over and let them pass already?!?'

Intelligent people laugh too!

Polluted geese

Cat in a tank...

How Nature Senses a Change in the Weather

A newborn parachutes to safety after the stork carrying him gets hit by a plane.

"You don't throw them back if they're too small!"

'Since I'm new here, let's start by clearning the air. You may have noticed that I'm short for a C.E.O. . .'

"We just haven't been flapping them hard enough."

Sign in tree from bird "next appearance 3:00 pm"

Fly Fishing

"We've discovered they mate for life, as long as they don't discuss politics."

'You know too much!'

"It turns out crows find a bunch of dead crows more frightening than a man made out of hay."