Bill Shuffler Enthusiast T-Shirts

Any more rude letters from you and yours won't even go into the shuffle.

'Today the stock market was moribund, as growth equities sputtered and bonds dipped due to the inverted yield curve. I'd translate that into layman's terms...but they don't pay me enough.'

'I always feel at the end of the day I could've taken credit for more.'

'Bring me an in basket and an out basket and some paperwork to shuffle between them.'

I am billing, therefore I am.

'Dear sir, every month we place all bills in a big pile on the table, and select six at random for payment...'

'I bet those are the accident reports.'

'Father, meet Sister Kate, she shimmies like a jelly upon a jelly plate.'

'You like my in-tray full, don't you?'

"No, Thursday's out. How about never - is never good for you?"

"How do you spell time management?"

'I teach history specializing in swashbuckling.'

"It's a 300 page government questionnaire about cutting back on bureaucracy."

Duel Fuel?

'Ok, the cat's away. Time to play.'

"Let's face it, this meeting isn't about tightening our work schedule. It's about stretching our deadline."

Pirate Schools

"I can't tell a lie, Samantha. I'm a two bird bloke."

'Well - unbuckle and get swashing.'

"This one starts the day here and usually finishes the day up here."

The 'Time Management' consultant rang to say she double booked and she's going to be late!"

Flexitime.

If I ever end up dancing like that, please buy me a one way ticket to Switzerland.

"We made it more convenient so that you don't even have to walk now."

Magic Trick

"Separate checks as always, Dr Jekyll."

"Shuffle Mode"

Watch that always reads: 'Later'.

"Penny for your thoughts? I'm a solicitor, it'll cost you five hundred!"

"I'm still righting wrongs. And you?

'Come out - you drunken old rat!'

Procrastinators Anonymous

'Shakers don't like subways'