Big Tech Analyst T-Shirts

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'What bothers me about these meetings is even though it's work, I have the nagging feeling I ought to leave and get back to work.'

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

The Businessmen Have to Make Decisions from Many Options

'This time we're going to do things right. And if that doesn't work, we'll just go back to stealing.'

"The data looks good, sir, but the vibes are mucho heavioso."

Businessmen trying to prop up a line-chart with sticks

'Quick! We need a bigger chart in here!'

Foreign Markets with Big Barriers

"How's everybody doing? I'm not boring you, am I?"

"Let me just check my email, my texts, my missed calls, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, WhatsApp, my credit score, my horoscope, the results of this latest personality test, the S. & P., the Dow, the news, this article about cute dogs, and the weather, and then we can go."

"Right about here there was a flattening of the curve. . ."

'I vote we hang the darn thing upside down and go home!'

"I think I'll be late back for tea. . . about a week."

"So, what brings you in today, Mr. Brooks? High anxiety again?"

Light Bulb Moment

"DeepSeek" "Stargate"

"The trend in tough economic times is to put off everything that doesn't require immediate action ? as this chart shows."

Build Your Own Portfolio

At first I thought it was just coincidence, but then I realized it corresponded directly to your shift.

"Morning, all!"

The Life of Pi

Lethal Presentation

'What happened to that efficiency report? I had it in my hand not two minutes ago.'

"I hate performance review season."

'Greek debt was downgraded for the 11th time this week, by S&P, to P.O.S. Negative Infinity, meaning it's safer to eat uranium, than own Greek debt.'

'We need to change our luck. Let's move our headquarters to Redmond, the home of Microsoft.'

Time Is Money

A presenter with a very complex chart to explain a business plan - 'And it's as simple as that!'

"If i were to kiss you then there is a 17% probability that we might get married and that has a 24% likelihood that we'd have children with a 34% change of divorce...I'm not sure I can risk it."

'Today the stock market was moribund, as growth equities sputtered and bonds dipped due to the inverted yield curve. I'd translate that into layman's terms...but they don't pay me enough.'

'Gentlemen, we need a slogan!'

'We're living in a round hole economy.'

'Why can't you tell me you love me without all the charts and graphs?!'

"Perhaps this slide whistle can better illustrate what this graph is telling us."