Bicycle Repair Technician Pillows

"There's a slight crack in your frame, but it's hard to tell what caused it – stress, proximity to water, or a combination of both."

The Mechanic

Drool Marks

"Take me to your mechanic."

"You might be interested in our encounter group for people with transmission problems."

'I said they're good, but expensive.'

You had me at vintage.

Organic Soldering.

"I've narrowed the problem down to somewhere under this big flap I discovered."

"Thanks to the Internet, I learned to ride a bike. Since I was bored, I also got my pilot's license."

'I think I've found what's been causing my funny buzzing sounds.'

"Good news...turns out it was just your battery!"

'Hi Terry. Quick question about that new gearbox you put in my Polo last week.'

Philip Nye – cycle chiropractor

"It'll need a carburettor transplant, a right wing panel augmentation, and an engine oil transfusion... Maybe you should consider euthanasia."

Road Buddies

'Oh I could fix it for under fifty bucks, but I just couldn't live with myself knowing that someday you might need a whole new engine.'

'I need a really loud horn. My brakes are a bit spongy.'

'Well, it wasn't the motor -- I'll try replacing the other stuff.'

"Yep, she's gonna cost ya—your microprocessor's shot."

'It's ok, sir, we'll put you in touch with one of our grief counselors.'

'Frankly the only Cheap way of getting rid of the knocking from the engine is to turn up the volume on the radio.'

A man with a deflated bicycle stands in line at the tire inflator.

CLEAR!

A self-filling prophecy.

"Sorry, but that's a road racing bike. I'm a mountain bike specialist."

' ... or you could park it near the Dynamite Shack at Klutz Construction.'

Mad Cyclist Disease, the latest problem to plague cyclists.

'Have you tried turning it off and on again?'

'Never, Ever...plan to pay for just an oil change when you take your car to the shop.'

'I've been in this business a long time, and believe me that's not laughing.'

'Before you say it's got some old parts, remember that you repaired it last time.'

Bicycle Pie Chart

'So, hows the ullage?'

"I found your problem. This is a horse."