Bibliophile In Purgatory T-Shirts

"Carrie, I told you that if I returned your library books that late that there would be hell to pay."

My Bookshelf Before the Internet

Edgar Allen Poe

The Dorrie Decimal System

Honoré de Balzac

"Now Playing: One of those Jane Austen movies."

Not to be a motion picture. Will remain just a book.

"Not that I have the time, but I enjoy reading."

Meet the author - celebrity autobiographies,

Literary Canines.

"Barb's such a fast reader."

'Yes, it's just a little volume.'

Litterary Dogs.

"Psst! Hey, kids."

'Read that last part back to me.'

'This book is so rare it's never been published.'

'It's very fast-paced. The book was over before I could finish reading it.'

'Chicken soup for dummies who don't sweat the small stuff.'

"Nevermore."

A man and his dog both reading.

'Yes, your papers seem to have lots of citations, but I've checked: They're all self-citations...'

'I'm a writer.' - 'What a coincidence, I'm a reader.'

'And I say he makes us look bad when he rides around listening to those books.'

"Spoiler alert...Z."

Book Thief in True Crime Department

"And last week I nearly crashed while reading on the freeway..."

Self-Improvement, Self-Empowerment, Self-Aggrandizement

Women who Read Too Much

"Boy, these are really overdue!"

"I'm taking you off sleeping pills and putting you on Proust."

'...and what's more, they're all first editions.'

Head full of Books.