Biblical Historian Pillows

'Oh, I understand -- with the 'coveting' part, we can get everybody!'

"Maybe you should go make sure we're in the right line."

The Israelites receive nanna from heaven.

'Wait - He that is without sin amongst you, let him cast the first stone.' (Huge boulder falls on woman from above).

"Wouldn't it have been easier to just download them?"

'Okay, but I think I'll need enforcers.'

'Read us the part where Adam and Eve get voted out of the garden!'

"No, this is NOT a beta-test!"

"They don't HAVE to be ratified!"

"If he doesn't like the hand puppet routine, I'll try running the burning bush idea by him."

"Perhaps if you guys just swam along behind us for a while."

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"I'm not having it if it's been genetically modified."

Moses on the web

"Samson was the best actor in the bible - he brought the house down!"

"Too 'Book of Genesis'?"

'Sire, Sodom and Gomorrah are requesting Federal disaster relief aid.'

"Damn. I think I missed the turn for Bethlehem."

"Wait 'til my Dad hears about this!"

'Just ask yourself -- Are you better off now than you were two thousand years ago?'

"Er – if you young people don't mind, I have a few things to do now. Perhaps you have a hotel or somewhere to go?"

The Apostle Paul receives a reply from the Corinthians.

'Wow! -- Talk about a paradigm shift!'

'Why me Lord?' '...because yo have animal magnetism Noah...'

"We didn't want to know the gender in advance."

"Could you all please pay attention while I go through the emergency procedure. . ."

"Sometimes Peter I wish it would just stay as water."

"You call this a constitution?"

Well HERE'S some good news...Judgement Day has been replaced by a multiple choice questionnaire.

"I've got writer's block."

Adam and Eve on a Talk Show

Ezekiel and his Dog: "Have you been in the valley of dry bones again?"

"When I was a child, I drank like a child, but when I became a man I put away childish drinks."

"So, like, don't make any big plans for this weekend."

'Can I download that as a PDF?'