Benefits Critic Pillows

'Health benefit? Didn't you get a personal first aid kit when you started working here?'

Universal Credits Computer: Kaput

"It's time to get politics out of money."

"Defense budget... Do you have any idea how much catnip $700 billion would buy?"

"I, too, hate being a greedy bastard, but we have a responsibility to our shareholders."

BP Greed Credentials - huge profits and cuts to environmental promises.

'I think the global banking sector, drunk on years of excessive bonuses, may need a little more than your 'very angry' T-shirt to make them toe the line.'

'Desks equipped with airbags - for now that's our company's health plan.'

"No, we don't have a pension plan. We don't expect our employees to ever retire."

"We must do something about the bloated, fat cat image bankers have a acquired...I think I'll settle for a bigger chair!"

'I'm looking for a workaholic who feels the great job he does is compensation enough.'

'There are some subjects that are off limits...CEO bonuses...Overtime pay...Business ethics...'

'All hail, our economic Overlords!'

'No thanks. I never sign a sales deal at the door.'

'I don't need your love. I need a 401 (k) and health insurance.'

'We really can't afford golden parachutes any more, but here's a plastic crash helmet.'

'You're offering me a job, eh? -- does it have portable benefits?'

Are you now, or have you ever been, a member of an organization advocating the overthrow of the generous executive bonus system in corporations?

Employee Benefits

"Incentive program, you mean like your paycheck?"

'With 13 holidays per year, 2 weeks sick leave, 2 coffee break each day, 4 weeks vacation a year, 80% of ife and health insurance, profit sharing, including various discounts and you still want a salary?'

"Our dental plan is fluoridation of the water cooler."

GOP: 'I didn't come to Washington to champion the midle class! There's no money in that!'

Man with a top hat. The lid of the hat is rising with some eyes peering out.

"I like everything about this neighborhood except the people who can afford to live here."

"I bought the roses. I don't need to smell them."

'You're on benefits, Mr Scrote, I can't sign you off work - I can only sign you off LOOKING for work.'

Boss in Office: 'We've had to recalibrate the bonus system - you now owe us five years worth of luncheon vouchers.'

Boardroom salaries

". . . You didn't have to pay for gas and electricity for five years! That's enough compensation, isn't it?"

"The government believes that the benefit system is out of hand!"

'You lot are wrong - he's fit enough to get back up there!'

'Just give your bonus back, and nobody needs to get hurt.'

'Two can live as cheaply as one, but I refuse to live with a cheapskate.'

No interest in work - claiming my share of US accumulated wealth...