Believer In Good Omens Gifts

"My palm's itching. Means I'm gonna make some money." "No Chuck. It means you need to wash."

'The BOSS sent me down to help rebuild your faith.'

"Ernestine is trying to get St. Patrick to change his mind."

'I sense that someone is about to swindle you.' 'Wow, thanks for the warning! How much do I owe you?'

"Why did we run out of wine?! I'll tell you why...Mary's son brought 12 of his friends who crashed the wedding party! That's why!"

"The Internet startup had only enough cash for one more day. But, miraculously, the money lasted for eight days, until more venture capital could be raised."

"Of all the wet cement, in all the towns, in all the world, she walks in mine."

'No wonder I'm exhausted. Look at my horoscope.'

'I just happened to be in the right place at the right time to make CEO.'

"I guessed my way to a perfect score on the GMAT, then I guessed my way through grad school and several middle management jobs...."

"Washing your car will cause it to rain – science or superstition? We investigate on the next 'Cause and Effect.'"

'Hope it's legit. I never had the chance to say good riddance.'

"I'm getting your dear, departed husband—he can't believe you paid forty-five dollars for this."

"Excuse me, do you folks believe in ghosts?"

'Hey, you could get arrested for doing stuff like... Oh, you ARE getting arrested.'

"Holy water, holy water...."

'Everything looks good, Now, we'll just bring in the company psychic to see if you have any pre-existing conditions from a previous life.'

'Fish and bread? That's it? Seriously?'

'He touched you and you can walk again? I just got an illegible prescription.'

"You'll do laundry, you'll drink water...oh, and what's this? In the near future you'll clip your fingernails."

'It's a medical miracle. According to your notes you should have been dead years ago!'

"Your recovery has defied all known science...so let's just keep this between ourselves!"

GOP presidental candidates on science!: 'Billions for astrollogers! Zero for astronomers!' s

"If only you knew. . ."

Lourdes - wheelchairs left behind.

'Church of the Divine Healing with an Emergency Room.'

Miracles on 34th Street.

'You had a good idea in our staff meeting yesterday. So, the church sent someone over to witness the miracle.'

'Hey, Naomi, remember last week when you said nothing short of a miracle could save MicroTechnoCom from bankruptcy?'

'I might be able to get you off if a chain of near miraculous rulings happen to occur.'

Despite hard evidence to the contrary it was still considered lucky to kiss the Blarney Spike

"Typical. You don't even know what's impossible!"

"My psychic tells me I was a glass of water in a previous life."

'A white cat! That's good luck.' 'It doesn't work that way.'

"Relax! He's in good hands!!"