Being Saved Pillows

Illustration for 'Foul Play', scene 1.

"Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Yay!!! I died rich!"

North Pole

'Me, I don't spend my pocket money: I hoard it...'

"Son, you're old enough now for The Talk: everything you need to know about compound interest."

'But Dad, all the other kids get a roth IRA as part of their allowance package.'

"We were able to retire 6 years early by canceling cable & eliminating anything fun."

Squirrel putting nuts in a safe box.

Piggy bank #6: Union Jack.

Thrift: have your arms and legs amputated, use a pillow for a bed!

'If only I'd spent as much time on my investment portfolio as I did on my lolly mix when I was a kid.'

'Do you think we should tell anyone about this?'

"I'm teaching him to rollover my 401 (k)."

Insect extinction

"What a tragedy... he still had two years of his super left..."

Nurse pushing the Grim Reaper out of the Surgery room.

Piggy bank #5: carrying (colour).

Investing your savings

'My allowance isn't much - but I have a great benefits package!'

Saving for College.

"Gee, thanks! What rate of interest does it pay?"

'And this is my strategic money reserve.'

"Forget the allowance - I need a benefactor!"

Roasting the Moneybox

'This is where I keep my investment portfolio.'

'You keep outliving your old-age retirement savings!'

"Dad, wouldn't my allowance be better off earning interest in a tax free municipal bond fund?"

'Can you loan me *** till pay day?'

Lifesaver!

'Looks like we'll have to break into the piggy bank to find our endowment funding.'

'Of course I'm squirreling away money!'

"It failed the stress test."

"We've decided to diversify our funds on some candy!"

A smiling man leaning on large piggy bank.

"I don't have time for piggy banks. Can't I just buy an ATM?"