Behavioral Researcher Gifts

Pavlov's Cat

"Bark or stare? Always a tough decision. Bark? Maybe stare? Whimper? Maybe? Meanwhile, stare."

"Sometimes ... I just want to run away."

"I know it’s an issue, and we’re working on it in therapy."

"You can stop pulling, you knucklehead—I took your leash off ten minutes ago."

"This may be Malcolm Gladwell talking, but we were married on the wrong day!"

The life of penguins.

It's my biggest project - a database of all my sister's boyfriends.

"My System 1 tells me she's articulate, capable, shrewd. My System 2 says BIMBO."

"I plan on keeping this off my resume!"

"Dopamine Casino. Gambling that makes you feel like gambling."

"Now, let your inner ‘bad dog’ answer the question ..."

Failures.

"So we're agreed—free will exists, unless there are treats."

"Oh, he claims I bit his head off, did he? And I suppose you BELIEVED him?"

Pavlov's dog

"He's so well behaved I'm really worried, doctor."

Tyler missed the old days before his parents used behavioral tracking software.

"They took my pellets, man, I been hitting' that lever al day, they took my PELLETS!"

Pavlov Throws Out The Anomaly

Pavlov's Dream

DATING FOR NON-DUMMIES

"So you feel like you are constantly being followed?"

"We got this. I was born in a corn maze." CS629922

"You have a remarkable lack of curiosity about your co-workers."

"People are crazy."

"I don't want them to smell fear, so I'm going to roll in something before the interview."

Freudian vs Behavior therapist.

Lab rat dreams.

'And what a horrible little package.'

Respect Zone: 'We respect yobs.'

'That's what I wanted to ask you about.'

"You've done it, Martin - you've taught him to smile!"

Before the Salivating Dogs