Bedtime Birdie Chaser Pillows

Sleepwalking Golfer

Being and Nothingness Pop-Up! (book)

'Never mind about buying that trampoline. I love your new bed!'

'I've always loved your adventurousness in bed.'

'Cover me... I'm going in.'

"No. You turn over."

Four fishermen catch the same fish.

"I have to say, sleeping in a coffin is way better since I got the box spring."

'Your direction is good! Now try for distance.'

'Don't ask me, I've never got one in a hole either.'

'And another thing - you hog the duvet!'

Sleeping masks

'Your backswing's too slow!'

'You shouldn't give that to a kid before bedtime. You know that will just wind him up.'

'And so we come to the concluding episode of Barthelmew Cubbins and the 500 hats.'

'It's an old badminton injury.'

A man in an airplane shoos away geese

How to tell you might be getting too close with your pet.

Parents sleeping with a new baby.

"Is this the first time you've done this this lark?"

'The pro said my swing was out of this world.'

Bedtime Reading

'Can you leave the light on? It's hard to sleep with the dark shining in my eyes.'

A sleeping man counting scuba-diving sheep

Rory McIlroy

"Our marriage will last a whole lot longer if you move and breathe minimally."

Garden store owner chasing away birds from his seed display.

'Uh-oh, Ben's 'wired' again, I better cut down on his high protein dog food.'

'It's a nice course. I just wish it wasn't so close to the airport.'

Bed time stories

'Why is it that there are so many bedtime stories about stupid princes and princesses, but no cool ones about zombies and chainsaws?'

"Just take the crowd out of it. Imagine everyone is naked."

'They saved their files before closing and lived happily ever after.'

"Many, many news cycles ago..."

Dad says to baby, 'If you keep this up you'll go to bed right this second, in a minute.'