Bedside Philosophers T-Shirts

Dress the thinker in your life with our bedside philosopher t-shirts, featuring smart, humorous designs that celebrate curiosity and the joy of pondering life's big questions.

All Products Prints T-Shirts Mugs Pillows

"Wrong side. Right side."

from $19.00

"Talk nerdy to me."

from $19.00

He can identify a fly taken by a trout at fifty yards range.

He can identify a fly taken by a trout at fifty yards range. mockup

He can identify a fly taken by a trout at fifty yards range.

from $19.00

Women in bed with her husband reads a book titled 'Sex Stinks'.

Women in bed with her husband reads a book titled 'Sex Stinks'. mockup

Women in bed with her husband reads a book titled 'Sex Stinks'.

from $19.00

Of pitting his own wits against their natural cunning

Of pitting his own wits against their natural cunning mockup

Of pitting his own wits against their natural cunning

from $19.00

"Well did he?"

from $19.00

"I feel your pain level."

from $19.00

"Think about the honey."

from $19.00

'Hold on there Jethro! You know I don't tolerate that kind of horseplay in this joint.'

'Hold on there Jethro! You know I don't tolerate that kind of horseplay in this joint.' mockup

'Hold on there Jethro! You know I don't tolerate that kind of horseplay in this joint.'

from $19.00

Meekness of Mr Pecksniff and his Charming Daughter

Meekness of Mr Pecksniff and his Charming Daughter mockup

Meekness of Mr Pecksniff and his Charming Daughter

from $19.00

'I ask myself-do I really want to sleep on the edge of the bed again?'

'I ask myself-do I really want to sleep on the edge of the bed again?' mockup

'I ask myself-do I really want to sleep on the edge of the bed again?'

from $19.00

'Instead of 'You're entering a world of pain', try 'This won't hurt a bit.''

'Instead of 'You're entering a world of pain', try 'This won't hurt a bit.'' mockup

'Instead of 'You're entering a world of pain', try 'This won't hurt a bit.''

from $19.00

'Have you been taking your medicine every day?'

'Have you been taking your medicine every day?' mockup

'Have you been taking your medicine every day?'

from $19.00

"Well, it's another brand-new day. What do you say to getting up and looking the damn thing straight in the eye?"

from $19.00

"We'd like to start out being very involved with you but eventually be drawn away to much more interesting cases down the hall."

"We'd like to start out being very involved with you but eventually be drawn away to much more interesting cases down the hall." mockup

"We'd like to start out being very involved with you but eventually be drawn away to much more interesting cases down the hall."

from $19.00

"I assure you I do appreciate what you're feeling."

"I assure you I do appreciate what you're feeling." mockup

"I assure you I do appreciate what you're feeling."

from $19.00

'Isn't there ANYTHING you can do, Doctor?'

'Isn't there ANYTHING you can do, Doctor?' mockup

'Isn't there ANYTHING you can do, Doctor?'

from $19.00

"Of course I'm listening to your expression of spiritual suffering. Don't you see me making eye contact, striking an open posture, leaning towards you and nodding emphatically."

"Of course I'm listening to your expression of spiritual suffering. Don't you see me making eye contact, striking an open posture, leaning towards you and nodding emphatically."

from $19.00

'I don't need that exercise stuff -- I cross the pain threshold just getting out of bed in the morning.'

'I don't need that exercise stuff -- I cross the pain threshold just getting out of bed in the morning.' mockup

'I don't need that exercise stuff -- I cross the pain threshold just getting out of bed in the morning.'

from $19.00

'I don't know what's wrong with you, you seem to have celibacy on the brain!'

'I don't know what's wrong with you, you seem to have celibacy on the brain!' mockup

'I don't know what's wrong with you, you seem to have celibacy on the brain!'

from $19.00

"I'll get that. First go get me a glass of warm water."

"I'll get that. First go get me a glass of warm water." mockup

"I'll get that. First go get me a glass of warm water."

from $19.00

'Doc, check out screen 2 in ten minutes...we got the big game!'

'Doc, check out screen 2 in ten minutes...we got the big game!' mockup

'Doc, check out screen 2 in ten minutes...we got the big game!'

from $19.00

How does she get her grass so green? mockup

How does she get her grass so green?

from $19.00

'One of life's great mysteries...Why does it take four week's salary to pay for two week's holiday?.'

'One of life's great mysteries...Why does it take four week's salary to pay for two week's holiday?.' mockup

'One of life's great mysteries...Why does it take four week's salary to pay for two week's holiday?.'

from $19.00

'Well, you could have fooled me. You look as though you're having a good time.'

'Well, you could have fooled me. You look as though you're having a good time.' mockup

'Well, you could have fooled me. You look as though you're having a good time.'

from $19.00

'Monday morning feeling? But it's thursday!'

'Monday morning feeling? But it's thursday!' mockup

'Monday morning feeling? But it's thursday!'

from $19.00

"I have no idea why Stuart Little’s mother is human — don’t overthink it."

"I have no idea why Stuart Little’s mother is human — don’t overthink it." mockup

"I have no idea why Stuart Little’s mother is human — don’t overthink it."

from $19.00

'Actually, you're my second patient if you count that cadaver in med school.'

'Actually, you're my second patient if you count that cadaver in med school.' mockup

'Actually, you're my second patient if you count that cadaver in med school.'

from $19.00

"But counting sheep makes me hungry." mockup

"But counting sheep makes me hungry."

from $19.00

Celestial reading lamp.

from $19.00

The end of the world is at hand: '10... 9... 8... 7...'

The end of the world is at hand: '10... 9... 8... 7...' mockup

The end of the world is at hand: '10... 9... 8... 7...'

from $19.00

'Get going or wait for the tide?' mockup

'Get going or wait for the tide?'

from $19.00

"It looks like the internal bleeding should - I'm sorry. It's taking everything in my power not to tickle you right now."

"It looks like the internal bleeding should - I'm sorry. It's taking everything in my power not to tickle you right now." mockup

"It looks like the internal bleeding should - I'm sorry. It's taking everything in my power not to tickle you right now."

from $19.00

"The doctor is a little squeamish, so don't mention anything gross."

"The doctor is a little squeamish, so don't mention anything gross." mockup

"The doctor is a little squeamish, so don't mention anything gross."

from $19.00

"You can't sleep? Have you tried meditating, then reading for an hour, then going to the couch...."

"You can't sleep? Have you tried meditating, then reading for an hour, then going to the couch...." mockup

"You can't sleep? Have you tried meditating, then reading for an hour, then going to the couch...."

from $19.00

Bedside Philosophers T-Shirts Collection

Bedside Philosophers Mugs

Explore our collection of mugs designed for bedside philosophers—perfect for morning coffees or midnight musings with clever, thought-provoking designs.

Bedside Philosophers Pillows

Find the perfect reflective pillow for their space—comfort and cleverness combined in designs that inspire thoughtful relaxation.

Bedside Philosophers Prints

Browse our thought-provoking prints that add a dash of wit and wisdom to any room, celebrating the creative curiosity of your favorite bedside philosopher.