Bedside Manner Buff Pillows

'Just remember, you're not alone - I'm scared to death, too.'

"I would not recommend you bypass heart surgery."

"Who knows how to take bad news?"

"I find this helps, when I have to tell a patient some devastating news."

"We're keeping you overnight because the nurses love you!"

"I'm fascinated by body language."

"I feel your pain level."

'I only got up for a drink of water, and a queue's formed next to my bed.'

Doctors Discussion

Wonders of evolution: Same face, totally different meaning.

'Instead of 'You're entering a world of pain', try 'This won't hurt a bit.''

'Have you been taking your medicine every day?'

'I'm referring you to a specialist who isn't as afraid to die as I am.'

'Either I've got bad news for you or my watch has stopped...'

'You're not listening to what you're hearing.'

"We'd like to start out being very involved with you but eventually be drawn away to much more interesting cases down the hall."

Non-verbal Management Skills.

"I assure you I do appreciate what you're feeling."

"Well done Carson! This could be the answer to our bed shortage problems!"

'Isn't there ANYTHING you can do, Doctor?'

"Of course I'm listening to your expression of spiritual suffering. Don't you see me making eye contact, striking an open posture, leaning towards you and nodding emphatically."

Body Language - Hiss!

'Doc, check out screen 2 in ten minutes...we got the big game!'

"The surgery went well. It had spread, but I'm quite confident we got it all."

'I've called maintenance about your bed, Mr. Grimes...Mr. Grimes?'

Body language: the double negative

Heyyy, don't worry about a thing. One more energy drink and I'll have you sliced and sutured in no time!

Silent Body Language

"Your bloodwork just came back. . . the GOOD news is that you've definitely got some!"

"He said absolutely, positively, read my lips - NO! Unless I'm reading him wrong, I'd say he's definitely warming up to the idea."

'I see you had egg for breakfast.' - 'Yesterday morning.'

'Actually, you're my second patient if you count that cadaver in med school.'

'It's alright for you - you're going home today!'

'We got your test results back. Read it and weep.' Bedside bloopers

'Wait a minute...did you just double-dip?'