Beauty Standards Commentator Prints

Bar Refaeli

All it takes is a little willpower and a good metabolism...

Missing my hair.

'I assure you madam, that the uglification factor of this mirror is no greater than the nationally accepted one-to-one standard.'

Man Inside TV Produces Ideal Viewer

"I see he finally got rid of that idiotic comb-over."

"She's genetically modified, you know."

Martina Klein

"You ain't wearin' a brassiere." "How could you tell?" "Cuz the wrinkles are all stretched out of yer face."

Toilet roll beauty tips.

Whatever look you were aiming for..you missed!

Frank and Ernest Updated Fairy Tales. Do you mean fair like "pretty" or fair like "evenhanded"?

Katy Perry

"Girlfriend, you're not fat. You're just retaining a little water."

"The cost of a haircut? It depends on what's in your underpants."

"My talent agent tells me I have the perfect face for a hand model."

Romee Strijd caricature

'Google Earth is getting SO precise! Right now, I'm zoomed in on Kathy Mangiante's face and I can tell she's had lip implants!'

Michael Jackson from the Thriller video...and at a recent court appearance.

TV Programme - Celebrity cosmetically enhanced body parts.

"Of course I love your long hair Rapunzel. But maybe you could shave your legs just once in a while?"

"Actually, I do look a lot like my mom. It's just that I have her first nose."

"What? It's been ten years. . . She's had six kids for goodness sake. She can't still be the fairest of them all!"

"Naturally curly hair."

"In my culture it is very important to have straight teeth."

'I was born as beautiful as you, but after a few years you will see...'

"I asked for razzle-dazzle – not frizzle-frazzle."

'There, but for liposuction, go I.'

"Make my face sag - I want people to think I've never had plastic surgery."

"I'm suck if this pressure to be beautiful all the time."

Got anything in high definition?

What puberty used to do. What puberty apparently does now.

Bridget Malcolm

Lara Catherina Stone

'Hey, awesome jacket, Melanie! Suede?'