Beauty Curious Gifts

"Getting a Brazilian has been nothing like I expected."

Bad hair day!

"I wish I had her jewelry." "I wish I had his wife." "I wish I had her figure." "I wish I had his money."

"Can you make wishes on fake eyelashes?"

Pampered and poodled.

Dating is so expensive...

Could you see anything in her? I certainly couldn't! (Man's eyes are popping out of his head).

"I don't like your application."

'Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who is the fairest algologist of all?'

What price beauty?

'I'm not begging, I've just painted my claws.'

'Don't all look at me like that! What did you expect the face pack to do for me?'

It was time for a little bit of lady admin

"Hair spray"

"I'm not trying to be beautiful, I'm only trying to look better than everyone else there."

New Twenty Blades

Cosmetics. Helps get rid of crow's feet.

'I'm still hot. It just comes in flashes now.'

"Mirror, mirror, on the wall, go to hell."

"We're having a make up test at school. Can I borrow your mascara?"

'Here's my fail proof way to restore a youthful appearance - a 30 watt bulb.'

"More concealer?"

'This is a very powerful perfume -- there's a ten-day waiting period.'

"I look kind of nice today. . . How long have I been this ugly?"

Mirror mirror...

Dr. and Mrs. Steven Mueller.

"I don'y know who did her, but when she laughs the wrinkles go in very weird directions."

'Botox...'

"That conditioner you recommended didn't do a damn bit of good."

'Well you tried, but be sure to keep Proof of Purchase.'

A cow with a Brazilian.

'Here you are Dear, here's a fiver. Go in there and have them make you look like a million dollars.'

Might be time to lighten up on those collagen implants, hon.

'And you thought that you had all the talent.'