Beauty Beginner Pillows

'Plastic Surgery for Beginners'

Bad hair day!

"Can you make wishes on fake eyelashes?"

Pampered and poodled.

Dating is so expensive...

What price beauty?

"I don't like your application."

Curling your hair for no reason

Have you got your make up on yet?

'I'm not begging, I've just painted my claws.'

'Don't all look at me like that! What did you expect the face pack to do for me?'

It was time for a little bit of lady admin

"I'm not trying to be beautiful, I'm only trying to look better than everyone else there."

Become a Cosmetic Surgeon - Raise a Few Eyebrows!

New Twenty Blades

'I'm still hot. It just comes in flashes now.'

'Here's my fail proof way to restore a youthful appearance - a 30 watt bulb.'

"Mirror, mirror, on the wall, go to hell."

"We're having a make up test at school. Can I borrow your mascara?"

'Well you tried, but be sure to keep Proof of Purchase.'

'Botox...'

"I don'y know who did her, but when she laughs the wrinkles go in very weird directions."

Dr. and Mrs. Steven Mueller.

"More concealer?"

Woman Curls Her Dog.

"I look kind of nice today. . . How long have I been this ugly?"

"That conditioner you recommended didn't do a damn bit of good."

Mirror mirror...

Complete Makeover

'This is a very powerful perfume -- there's a ten-day waiting period.'

'Ask your doctor if getting your fat butt off the couch might be right for you!'

Might be time to lighten up on those collagen implants, hon.

A cow with a Brazilian.

'Here you are Dear, here's a fiver. Go in there and have them make you look like a million dollars.'