Beatnik Birdwatcher T-Shirts

"Thor! I am Thor! Ha. Just kidding. I'm Tom the Seagull."

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

"The fish sticks here are very good."

Bird feeding chick that is nesting in a knight's helmet

'Why don't you just pull over and let them pass already?!?'

Intelligent people laugh too!

"Now I really hate poetry."

"Sure my wings flap 70 times per second-- I've been sipping nectar all day."

'Bob, I know you're a Mockingbird, but a few compliments every now and then would greatly help your marriage...'

he tries to fly all the time but actually never gets airborne

"Wait—did you procure that worm humanely?"

'Trust me, there's nobody to rescue that way...'

Scene of seagull troops about to charge a picnic.

Endangered wildlife 'Lost' posters stuck on trees surrounded by rubbish

"Don't wait up. I'll be working late again tonight."

"Um, Larry? That’s not a quail."

'Humans are so considerate: They put perches like these for us on every one of their houses...'

"Honestly, sweetheart, you're not like the others I've been out with."

"Two vegans, please."

'Well, we always go to the same place for our holidays, so yes, we kind of migrate too...'

Bird Torture.

"I know we got early to catch him...but he looks so cute I just can't eat him!"

"I see by your resume this would be your first time in a symbiotic relationship."

"I'd kill for a fresh fruit fritter."

'Some of these trees have been here for 2000 years... and they still can't talk. Man, we're awesome!'

'It's a blonde, long-legged species with a melodious voice and it goes south for the winter.'

'Well, thanks, but we have no need of a Divorce Lawyer: We're Lovebirds you see...'

'I really think we took a wrong turn.'

Vegetarian Birds

"Migration ruins my 10,000 steps."

"Do you know any other songs besides the theme to The Andy Griffin Show?"

'Hon? Did your phone go dead? Hello?'

"That's it, Tom. Here they come. Just keep playing 'Freebird.'"