Bean Counter Extraordinaire Gifts

"Oh, that three billion dollars."

'You wouldn't happen to be sitting on my entry to the straightest runner bean competition?'

"We're pleased to announce that your company has shrewdly traded a cow for some magic beans." some ma

Clown's Comedy Fart.

When the ship needed to go faster than Warp Speed, the crew ate lots of pungent beans.

"I've decided to make myself another cup of coffee!"

Accountant Bedtime Stories

"When the dating agency said you were full of beans..."

"These are magic beans, my boy. Their value comes from growth and scale, not revenue."

"I want to spill the beans, but I'm waiting till I have access to classified or sensitive beans."

'How about a windfall tax on baked beans?'

'CPA's' evolving into 'Consultants'

'The pound looks strong to day. Yes, against the Zambesi bean.'

'The employee who guesses closest to the correct number of beans in this jar will be awarded this year's annual pay increase! -Management, ATOZ Accountants

Where Jelly Beans Come From....

Company profit making scheme - Jenkins, you owe us £327.95.

'Ah, Garbanzo, truly you are a noble bean.'

'Sorry about that - Lenny accidentally used jumping beans.'

Do you want this set of books, or the set you keep in the broom cupboard?

"Mother, I sold the cow for some financial derivatives."

"Whole bean or ground relentlessly to dust?"

"Our accountancy firm says that there are a number of ways to interpret the figures... which one do you prefer?"

'I've added this up six times and still can't get it to balance!'

"She's passed out...quick! take her pulses!"

"These here accountants should be ready just in time for tax season."

'Stocks rose on news engineers are close to developing a car that runs on lattes!'

"I do a lot for charity but I don't like to talk about it. . ."

'No more beans this week, I think, Matilda.'

C.P.A.

Can I get you another coffee?

"He put the 'fun' in funding."

Stocktaker counts contents of baked-bean tins.

Coffee Overload: 'I'll have a low fat soy latte, no sugar, two biscotti...make that a Columbian-Kenyan bean bend...oh make it snappy, I'm in a hurry!'

Tax - Random Audit

Middle Distance Runners