Beach Bum Gifts

People dressed in green roll up the beach like a carpet

"It's time for us to go back to Sixty-fifth and Third, Richard."

Sunbathing Police Officer

"Where? Where?"

An email finds you

'For cryin' out loud! Can't you forget about work for just one day?!'

'I'm MELTING!!!' - 'Oh knock it off, we're ALL hot!'

"I told you to wear sunscreen."

'For cryin' out loud! Just for once can't we go on vacation without you bringing some work along!?'

"It's over. Go home."

"The listing said it's only one block from the beach!"

'I'm semi-retired.'

That's a material breach if I've ever seen one.

"God, I love the smell of sunblock in the morning."

'No, Jason, I don't know why the T in 'Tsunami' is silent! Just run!'

A man a plan a canal Panama.

'You're going to get baked out there. At least put on some butter or sour cream.'

Lawyer to client: 'Your slip and fall on ice would have more credibility if you weren't drinking ice tea at the time ... at South Beach.'

'We're with the Nuclear Regulatory Commission. Got a minute?'

Dave - We need you back at the office.

'Arnie fell asleep under his beach chair.'

Climate change Rebranded as "Endless Summer."

Caribbean Airport Security

"See, I told you sharks don't attack lawyers. It's a respect thing."

'I've got no problem with December, but what do I blog about the rest of the year?'

"Damn the Germans got here first!"

"I smell bacon. Are you wearing sunscreen?"

'Now try and relax - we're on holiday!'

" ... well yes, technically this is waterfront property, but ... "

"Armand, which summer did we become chair people?"

School Trip To The Beach

'Oh God! It's that dreadful pig we met on our honeymoon last year.'

"Aha! - there's a nice spot for a picnic..."

"What a vacation - we swam with dolphins!"

'What makes you think I'm not at my desk?'