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Abraham sacrifices Isaac

Monster Baseball. The team's continuing to have some problems this season. Jekyll is good one day and bad the next. Dracula only shows up for night games. The Mummy is always covered in bandages and on the injured list. And King Kong can't keep his mind on the game --- Whenever he sees a pretty woman, he climbs up into the stands after her! At least Frankenstein has been pitching great again, just like when he was young! Yeah, he has a completely new arm!

'Wow! That was some world series, Ella! Both Pujols and Holland were just amazing...'

Life with a professional baseball catcher.

Church for sports worshipers.

Mr. Metamorphosis: "At least this better than waking up as a cockroach."

Open mike night presents Sadie Cohen. Summer's almost over

"Thanks for walking a mile in my shoe but it's beginning to hurt now."

"Still, diving for it would look good on my college application.

"There will be a winning team and a losing team. Are you OK with that?"

Team Leader

'How can we solve this problem by eating?'

'The Board has chosen you to handle the restructuring because you have no heart.'

What McWit lacks in speed he gains in nose.

'Look around, son. See if there's one you like. But remember: These are abandoned players, unwanted by their teams - so they might come with some psychological baggage.'

Old navy veteran 3rd base coach

"That's Paul, he's our head of partnerships..."

'We're like family. I look out for them. They look out for me.'

Radar Gun Readings at Baseball Stadium

'I'm not abandoned. I'm a free agent.'

I can't decide. Should I go to soccer camp 3 weeks in a row? Or soccer, then baseball then lacrosse camp? 3 soccers. Isn't overspecializing at his age bad? Possibly. But 3 different sports means�buying 3 different sets of expensive equipment. Right, He does have a mean corner kick.

"Lordy, I am such a klutz!"

"I AM at my usual position."

"I was sent down to the minors and from there to Europe, and one thing just led to another."

"I never knew God was such a sports fan."

'The toughest things you have to deal with in this job, is feelings and lawyers.'

"I don't believe I've missed a single sign since you made the switch to Power Point."

'Thou shalt not steal...except for bases.'

"They’re baseballs. You throw ’em."

High-gravity baseball

"They've given me the Lion's share of budgetary constraints."

"I wanted to be a baseball player 'til I found out they send you to the showers."

"Damn those dugout Martinis!"

I think this interleague play is getting out of hand.

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